


I Fall To Pieces

by VintageQueer



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Artist Keith (Voltron), Everyone is either an engineer or a mechanic essentially, Exes, Friends to Lovers, Friends to lovers to strangers back to friends and to lovers all over again, Gay Disaster Keith (Voltron), Gay Disaster Shiro (Voltron), Mild Angst, Mutual Pining, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Relationship(s), Pining, Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Shiro (Voltron), Slow Burn, Smut, Sort Of, They make motorcycles, Thirsty Keith, Thirsty Shiro, though it is mostly unimportant to the plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-27
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-02-26 20:28:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 42,799
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21984802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VintageQueer/pseuds/VintageQueer
Summary: Keith was absolutely in love with Shiro. But he never said it. Never pushed that line. So, they were just friends who had passionate sex and cuddled and went on dates and held hands everywhere they went and made plans for their future together.And then Shiro went home to japan during summer vacation.But Shiro never came back and Keith was never able to find him. He was never able to move on.He tried. He really tried. But no one would ever be able to take Keith apart so easily and put him back together again so seamlessly. Not the way Shiro did.And  now here he is. Three years later, standing directly in front of an office with Shiro’s name engraved into a shiny gold plaque hanging on the door, right in front of his face, mocking him.
Relationships: Keith/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 118
Kudos: 277





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The song is 'I fall to pieces' by Patsy Cline.

Keiths Monday mornings usually went the same way. Usually he was pulling himself from someone else’s bed, scrounging up whatever clothes he could find abandoned from last night, get his personal affects and run out the door before the stranger even knew he was awake.

Not today though. Keith couldn’t really afford to be disgustingly hung over and sexually frustrated today. Today he had a job interview. A damn fucking good one too. One that if he landed, the pay checks would not only pay all his bills but possibly allow him a kitchen full of something besides dollar store junk meals. 

Keith's a mechanic. Usually. He's actually better at drawing up the design of the engine rather than putting it together or fixing it but thats not much of a help in most garages. And the lack of a degree due to him recklessly dropping out halfway through college doesn’t exactly help him land the kinda jobs he would be good at. 

But that changes today. 

Last week, after a six pack of beer and a pity pep talk from his mother, Keith submitted one of his motorcycle designs along with his resume to Altea Motors, a small and local but powerful company. 

Not even a full 24 hours after sending his drunken email Keith received a response from the CEO herself offering to not only buy the design off of Keith, but to schedule an interview to see about hiring him full time. Keith agreed right away. He had no reason at all to say no. Especially not as he looks around his bare living room and takes in the fact that he's sitting on the floor because he never actually got around to buying furniture for the shitty cardboard box he calls an apartment.

Long story short. The interview was scheduled for today. Monday. 9am. Which is why there was no way in hell Keith was going to risk participating in his usual drunken and slutty weekend benders at his favorite bar. He had a damn good first impression to make.

"Mr. Kogane. It's so nice to meet you in person. I am Allura Altea. CEO of Altea Motors. I am delighted to have you join me today." 

"It's nice to meet you too, Ms. Altea." He nods, shakes her hand and settles into the comfy seat in front of her large sleek white desk.

"Please. Just call me Allura, Mr. Kogane"

"Then call me Keith" she nods with a grin as she pulls open a file and sets it in front of her, Keith straightens his tie. He's wearing the only one he owns. Classic black tie over his red button-down dress shirt. It’s a little too tight on him, seeing he’s owned it for about four years, but it’s still looks good and it’s the best he’s got. He wanted to look as nice as he could.

"Keith. I'll be honest with you. This interview is just a formality. We want you here. We've already made up our minds on hiring you. We simply wanted to be sure that you'd be comfortable working here, and if your answer is yes, then we'll negotiate the price of that first design of yours and we'll get you a work contract written up" Her lips fall into a flat line as she lets out a deep sigh, like she’s ready for Keith to reject her when it should be the other way around.

"I dont understand why you’d think I wouldn’t want to work here. This is an amazing opportunity for me. Of course, I want the job" she stands suddenly, gesturing towards the door instead of answering him.

"Let’s take a tour, shall we." 

Keith hesitantly nods but follows her out the door. She leads him through a couple different rooms. He meets two of the main engineers. He meets her assistant Romelle. He meets the vice president of the company Coran. He meets the main (and very annoying)marketing director and some minor engineers and technicians here and there. And then she leads him to the office opposite of hers, that she pointedly ignored earlier. She doesn’t knock on the door, and Keith is very grateful that she doesn’t.

"He's having a meeting right now. I won’t disturb him. But this is my general manager’s office. He handles a lot for me. After Coran and me, he’s the most important person here. He has a hand in every part of this company. He doesn’t know I plan to hire you though. His name is Takashi Shirogane."

She doesn’t need to say it. Keith has stopped listening anyway. His heart is hammering in his chest like it's trying to escape. His mind is screaming. He swears he feels the bottom of his stomach drop and the air in his lungs freeze up.

Takashi Shirogane. Keiths best friend in his first year of college. First person Keith ever really let in since he lost his parents. They were fuck buddies too, after a while. They were friends for about a year before It started slowly progressing into something a bit more. A hand job given after a whole bottle of vodka had somehow disappeared between the two of them during movie night. A couple of very awkward days later it was a blow job, no alcohol needed this time. A week after that and Shiro was taking Keith apart on his fingers. By the end of the month they spent most of their nights with Shiro absolutely wrecking Keith in all the most wonderful ways. They were practically dating. Hell, they were practically married. In every sense but with the words to prove it.

Keith was absolutely in love with Shiro. But he never said it. Never pushed that line. So, they were just friends who had passionate sex and cuddled and went on dates and held hands everywhere they went and made plans for their future together. 

And then Shiro went home to japan during summer vacation.

Keith didnt have the money to go with him and he didnt want to make shiro pay for his ticket so he stayed behind.

But Shiro never came back and Keith was never able to find him. He was never able to move on.

He tried. He really tried. But no one would ever be able to take Keith apart so easily and put him back together again so seamlessly. Not the way Shiro did. 

And now here he is. Three years later, standing directly in front of an office with Shiro’s name engraved into a shiny gold plaque hanging on the door, right in front of his face, mocking him. 

"Can I uhm..." he swallows the thick lump of panic thats quickly forming in his throat. "Can I get back to you on this?"

She nods and offers him an understanding smile. "Of course. I hate to pressure you, but I would like a response by the end of the week. We need to fill this position and I do think you're the best match for our team, personal pasts aside." 

Keith can only nod. She escorts him out and the second he releases her from their goodbye hand shake, he takes off. He gets as far away from that building as possible. 

It takes three days for Keith to text Allura. It takes till the moment that he's shitfaced drunk on his living room floor, eating the last of his ramen noodle cups and watching YouTube videos on his laptop (because he had to cancel his Netflix subscription) in mostly darkness (because one of the lights went out and he's got exactly 3.42 in his bank account and can’t afford to buy a new bulb and the apartment supervisor sucks), with only the massive ball of fur he calls his dog to keep him warm(because his shitty apartment somehow doesn’t have central heating, and he hasn’t had the money to buy a space heater and all his blankets have run thin from years of use) at 6pm on a Thursday. 

Keith gives up on staring at the styrofoam bottom of his ramen container and ends up sending Allura a very professional acceptance text. ' **Fuck it. I'll take the damn Job'**

 **'Excellent Keith. I'll see you in my office tomorrow morning at 9!'** She responds instantly. Clearly delighted.

Keith hesitates before texting her again.

**'Does he know.'**

**'Yes, he's aware. I informed him after you left. He's been trying to squeeze your personal information out of me since, but I've kept it confidential for your sake. He was hoping you'd accept the job.'**

**'Fuck'.** Is all he responds. He can worry about cursing in front of his new boss later.

For now, he sets aside the empty ramen cup and pushes his laptop away and curls into a ball on the ancient carpet, using Kosmo as a pillow and lets his drunken exhaustion take over.

He dreams about the first time Shiro fucked him. When Shiro had asked him what he wanted and Keith(tongue loose from two beers and already slightly horny from the way shiro had been rubbing his side during the movie) had responded "for you to wreck me" without hesitation, not realizing that Shiro had been asking what he wanted to eat.

Shiro happily obliged and gave Keith everything he wanted anyway, and they never did get dinner that night. He dreams about the way Shiro's fingers felt against his skin. The way Shiro kissed him. The deep growls that rolled off Shiro’s tongue. The way he broke Keith open on his cock. He asked to be ruined and he was. After that night he was absolutely ruined for anyone else. No one else could ever have him the way Shiro did.

He woke up Friday morning, face flush, sweaty, morning wood very apparent and an ache in his back that he knows won’t come out for a few days.

He hasn’t figured out how he's going to face Shiro. Maybe he won't have to. Allura seems to be aware of the situation. Maybe he can just. Avoid it.

He dresses fast and clean and with the intention to impress in the case he does see Shiro. He's not gonna go crawling back to him. Fuck that.

Shiro lost all of Keiths trust. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want Shiro to be well aware of what he lost. He doesn’t know why Shiro left him, He doesn’t know why he never come back, and a part of Keith doesn’t want to know.

Keith has abandonment issues. His mother left at birth, his father left for work one day and died on the job and never came home, he was pushed around from foster home after foster home his entire life, he never kept a single friend.

Until Shiro.

And Shiro knew all of that. He knew Keith had issues. He knew Keith’s biggest fear was Shiro leaving and he did it anyway. If Keith ever does give Shiro the chance to explain himself, then he better have a real fuckn good reason.

He gets his best and tightest black jeans out. The ones that hug his ass and legs in all the best ways. He wears the only other button up shirt he has. It’s a clean soft charcoal gray. He leaves the top couple buttons undone, sure that his collarbones are visible. He tosses his leather jacket on and ties his hair into a tight over the shoulder braid. It's getting too long. But he knows Shiro likes it that way. Knows Shiro likes to run his fingers through his hair and play with it, pull it when they’re having sex.

He's being petty and he knows it. But he figures he has every right to be.

He doesn't eat breakfast. His stomach is too knotted to even think of putting anything in it. He heads straight downtown to Altea Motors. Sure enough, he spots Shiro right away. He's right outside his office, which is across from Allura’s. Shiro is talking to the engineer he met yesterday, the one thats the spitting image of Shiro’s old roommate Matt. 

"Sorry, Shiro. Allura’s got me blocked out. She knew you’d try to get his info and she’s taken all her precautions.” Keith hears the way the shorter not-Matt scolds Shiro. Allura already warned him that Shiro was trying to get his contact information but this is different. Keith can see the pain and sorrow and frustration in Shiro’s dark gray eyes. It hurts. It hurts to see Shiro searching for him like this, but then he remembers all the months, the years, that he looked for Shiro only to find nothing.

He rushes towards Allura’s office, using the conversation as an opportunity to keep Shiro distracted, but Shiro looks up and spots him just as he steps into Allura’s office. He's quick to lock the door behind him.

"I changed my mind again. I dont think I can do this if I have to see him like this every day." Keith shakes his head as he turns to face Allura. Theres a frantic nock on the door against his back. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knows he can hear a voice calling for him. A voice that he tunes out. A voice he is not ready to hear yet.

"I thought of that already. Here. This is sufficient payment for the design you submitted plus a starting bonus. I want your creativity on this team, to be honest, we _need_ your creativity and talent. I won’t force you to be here. I want to work something out with you. I am willing to let you work from home. You'll only have to come in a few times a month. Or I can meet with you somewhere outside of work. But you should know Shiro’s gonna do everything in his power to find you. He's been trying to find you for years." He bites his lip and nods.

He’s pissed at the notion that Shiro was the one searching. Shiro is the one who disappeared. But it also hurts. He could see the pain on Shiro’s face, he can sense it in the desperate knocking on the door, and he can hear it in Allura’s voice as she talks about Shiro.

Whatever Shiro’s reason for leaving was, it hurt him too. But that doesn’t excuse Keiths suffering. He reaches up and rubs at his eyes. He’s on the verge of tears, which is something that usually only happens when he’s drunk. He refuses to cry here. In front of her. He can't walk out the door and let Shiro see him crying. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes for a second, trying to calm himself down.

"Thank you so much for the opportunity" he says, once he’s called down and opens his eyes again. She pushes the check forward with a nod and he gladly takes it. His jaw nearly drops to the floor as he realizes the number on it. It's more than enough for his rent. It's enough for his rent and his insurance and all his utility bills and to fill up his kitchen, get his Netflix subscription back, replace his lightbulb and get a space heater and the good canned dog food for Kosmo and then some. There's no way he's quitting this job. It’s like winning the lottery. 

"Now, how fast can you run?" She reaches into her desk and pulls out her cell phone, a small smirk pulling up on her pink lips..

"I was in track all four years of high school. And I've got the trophies and medals to prove it." He tells her, but he’s got a feeling she already knows that.

"I am going to text someone to get Shiro away from the door. It'll give you a few minutes to get out before he can get to you."

"Thank you. Thank you so much Allura."

"You’re welcome. But I must say. I wish you wouldn’t run. I understand why you want to. But you shouldn’t have to." There’s something in her crystal blue eyes that sparkles when she looks at him. Something that supplies Keith with both a hundred answers and a million new questions. He knows she’s right. He shouldn’t have to run. But he has to.

He’s not strong enough to face Shiro. But he’s fast enough to avoid it. He’s been running his whole life. Shiro was the one thing that actually managed to ground him, but the second he got cut free from that Anchor, he drifted and now he doesn’t think he can actually stop running. He runs because he has to. He has no other choice now.

* * *

Shiro was going to marry Keith. When Shiro went back to Japan for summer vacation that year, he was going to tell his family, and make the ring.

That’s right, Shiro made a ring. He didn’t buy. Money didn’t mean much to Keith other than survival. Shiro knew that if he was going to impress his hopefully eventual husband, he was going to have to go big. Something hand made with love and care and dedication would mean so much more to Keith than something Shiro picked out in a glass case and dropped his credit card on the counter for.

Matt, Shiro’s room mate at the time helped him forge a plan, and decided to tag along(with his dad too), mainly as an excuse to go some huge robotics convention, but also because Matt wanted to claim dibs on his position as the Best Man.

The plan was to get to Japan, announce to his grandfather that he planned to propose to Keith, then work with his grandfather to forge a ring worthy of Keith Kogane. They made a couple mock designs and everything.

But life had other plans, and they got in a car crash five minutes outside of the airport that cost Shiro his arm, almost a year and a half of his life, and his grandfather.

Shiro was in a coma for eleven months. He spent another three in and out of consciousness, with serious head trauma and memory loss. The next two months after that were spent in intense physical and mental therapy trying to regain all that he’d lost after his trauma.

The first thing Shiro did when he remembered who he was, was try to call Keith. But he had no luck. The phone was disconnected. Matt had already been trying since he was freed from his own brief stint in the hospital. Matt had been calling for months only to be told that Keith had dropped out of college and hadn’t been seen since Shiro was officially declared missing. Shiro tried everything and anything he could think of. But Keith was a true hermit and he didn’t have any family to talk to and he had few friends outside Shiro’s circle. He wasn’t on any radar.

Shiro mourned the loss of Keith more than his own arm.

A couple more months and Shiro was released from the hospital and he got on the first flight he could to go home. He spent about a month drunk, wallowing in depression and pity on the Holt’s couch before Matt got tired of it. He all but forced Shiro back on his feet.

The whole family worked together to make Shiro a high-tech cybernetic prosthetic arm, so Shiro couldn’t exactly say no to him. He had to work out a lot, regain a lot of muscle mass in order to maintain the arm. Also, to compensate for how old his now stark white hair made him feel. And a few more months later, and Shiro’s suddenly being stopped in the gym by Allura Altea, CEO of Altea Motors, of all people, to not just talk to him about the fine machinery of his arm but to offer him and whoever made it a job.

That’s how he ends up finding Keith again. He finds Keith tossed in the middle of a work email Allura slyly sends him about hiring someone new for the design team. Right smack in the middle of it. ‘I’ve found an excellent opprotunity in one mechanic by the name of keith kogane, and I think he’d make an excellent edition to our team’. She doesn’t even capitalize his name, and she puts it right in the middle of a paragraph where it doesn’t fit. Almost as if she thinks Shiro won’t notice it. But he does. Oh, he does. His eyes draw to Keiths name before he even reads the subject of the email. He’s like a moth to a flame when it comes to Keith.

He goes to Allura immediately to talk to her. But she refuses to give him anything other than ‘He had a very interesting creativity to offer to our team. I can not disrespect company privacy policy’ and when he asked if any of the others, who had somehow managed to meet Keith during his ‘tour’ without realizing what was going on, they all weren’t capable of getting him the information.

What hurts him the most is knowing that Allura warned Keith that he worked here.

Allura has become a close friend during their long months working together, and so eventually Shiro told her the story. She knew who Keith was when she offered him the job. She knew.

Shiro was even so desperate enough to ask Pidge, Matts younger sibling and the companies’ best technician to try and hack the system, but Allura thought ahead for that.

He caught one, One glimpse of Keith, just before he dipped into Allura’s office.

God, he’s as beautiful as ever.

He’s grown taller, at least be two or three inches. He’s grown out too, he used to be so slim and tiny. He still is, but his shoulders have grown wide, and now there’s strong, powerfully wired muscle not so subtly hiding beneath tight clothes.

His hair is longer too. It’s the same silky black that Shiro has always loved to run his hands through but now it’s long enough for Keith to put up in an actual braid. An actual, long braid that drapes over his shoulder. When he first met Keith, his hair was just long enough that it kept getting called a mullet, and by the time Shiro left for japan it was just long enough to be put in a tiny ponytail. Shiro loved Keith’s long hair. It gave him more to play with, more to pull. And Keith knows that.

He kept it long for Shiro. That may sound egotistical, but Shiro knows Keith. He knows that Keith always saw long hair as a nuisance, another unnecessary annoyance for him to have to deal with every day, especially with how unruly and thick his hair is. But he knew Shiro loved his long hair. He knew Shiro loved running his hands through it and playing with it. He loved when Shiro would wash his hair for him in the shower and brush it out afterwards, just as much as Shiro himself loved doing it. Keith made it clear to him that if it weren’t for Shiro, he’d just chop off all his hair. But he hasn’t.

Shiro’s heart thrums erratically in his chest as he knocks on Allura’s office door, he calls for Keith, begs him to come out but he’s met only with silence. He stays stubbornly by the door for a few minutes before Lance, their marketing and social media director happens by.

“Hey Shiro, my dude, whatchya’ doin out here?” Lance stops in front of him and joins Shiro in leaning against the wall. Lance has always been this casual. He follows office dress code, but somehow always manages to make his business attire still look comfortable. He brings a relaxed and often fun vibe to the office that’s usually very much appreciated.

“Allura is having her interview with Keith right now” He doesn’t bother lying. This is a small office, and they’re all close friends at this point, which means the rumors and gossip travel fast. Everyone here knows about Keith by now. They might not have when they first met Keith during his ‘tour’ on Monday, but they definitely know by now.

“Oof. So you’re out here waiting on your long lost emo boyfriend… No offense dude, but you kinda look like shit. I mean, as much like shit as _you_ can.... Look, Allura’s interviews take forever, you know that, she’s real picky, dots all her ‘I’s and crosses all her ‘T’s and what not. Come with me to my office, real quick, we’ll get some concealer to hide the fact that you probably havent slept all week. I’ve even got a vase of fresh flowers, I’ll let you steal them so you can impress your man.” Lance steps towards Shiro and pats him on the shoulder. Shiro lets out a slight sigh. He knows Lance is right.

He really hasn’t slept since Monday. Every time he tries he’s haunted by Keith in his dreams and it hurts too much to sleep. If he’s gonna face Keith, it might be better to not face him when he looks like garbage. And the flowers would be a big help. Keith would never admit it to anyone that’s not Shiro, but after living out his childhood in a barren dessert, he loves fresh flowers.

“Yeah… Yeah, thanks Lance” He agrees. He pushes off the wall and starts to follow Lance down the hall, but the second they reach the end of the hallway, he hears a door click open and he turns around, sure enough, to find Keith bolting out the front door.

“Sorry, Dude” Lance pats his shoulder again, and when Shiro turns to him, he notices the phone in his hand and realizes too late that he was being set up.

“Fuck” He curses. Slumping himself back against the wall.

“Sorry, Man… Look, Keith will talk to you when he’s ready. Allura doesn’t think trying to force him or corner him into a conversation is gonna help, and I agree with her. Be patient dude. Like you’re always telling us, Patience yields focus.”

Shiro drops his head back the wall, closes his eyes and lets out a quiet huff.

He hates having his words tossed back at him. Lance is well meaning about it, but that doesn’t make it any less annoying for him.

He’s tired of being patient. It’s been over 3 years. 3 years since he’s seen the love of his life. 3 years of pain and loneliness and now all of a sudden Keith is working in the same building as him and he still can’t get to him. So close and yet so far.

This tiny gap of distance is so much more painful than not knowing where Keith is. Before he could pretend that Keith was out there somewhere looking for him too and they’d find eachother and run back to eachothers arms and kiss and promise to never leave eachothers sides again. He could imagine that when they reunited it would be a fairytale happily ever after situation.

But now they’ve found eachother again and Keiths making it clear he doesn’t want to be reunited. He runs from Shiro, won’t even look him in the eye. He doesn’t blame Keith. Keith has every right to be hurt and angry with him. He doesn’t know what happened, so Shiro can’t blame him for being upset, but that doesn’t keep his heart from breaking all over again every time he Keith runs from him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys like the story so far! Let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every day he gained a little more of Keiths trust and his affection.
> 
> And he’s going to do it all over again, no matter how long it takes or what it takes.
> 
> He’s willing to work with Keith to get back to where they were.

The thing about the human subconscious is that, in Keiths humble opinion, it’s rude.

Keith is an observant person. It’s his natural instinct to scan his surroundings and take in everything he see’s in a split second. It’s him unconsciously looking for danger. He learned that after a couple months in the orphanage. Always keep an eye out for danger.

The danger he looks for now, every time he steps anywhere near Altea Motors is Shiro.

He’s been working there for three days. He started there officially on Friday, and it is now Monday at midnight. For the past three days Keith has gotten up ridiculously early so that he could meet Allura in her office at 4:30 in the morning, three hours before Shiro usually arrives to work. Keith is usually bolting out the door as Shiro’s parking his car.

He always manages to get a good glimpse of Shiro. He sees the stark silver hair, the jagged scar over the bridge of his nose, and the sleek white metal in place of his right arm.

Shiro has changed so much in three years.

He’s somehow taller, and even more muscular than before, which Keith didn’t think was possible, but it makes sense. He has to support all that metal somehow. 

His eyes look darker, and they look tired.

So much about him has changed.

But it’s still Shiro.

He’d know Shiro anywhere.

He tries not to think about the changes. He registers that it’s Shiro in his mind and tries to push all the other little details away. Somewhere in the back of his mind he knows. He knows that whatever changed Shiro is the reason he never came home.

He knows that Shiro didn’t leave him voluntarily.

But that doesn’t change all the years of hurt.

He’s lived with a broken heart for three years now. He doesn’t know if it can ever be healed.

Apparently his subconscious disagrees.

For the past three nights, when Keith goes to sleep, he dreams of Shiro.

But not like before.

He dreams of _this_ Shiro.

He dreams of white hair and black eyes.

The memories of Shiro’s hands against his skin have warped to accommodate for the touch of smooth metal.

He imagines the feeling of scars under his fingertips when he wraps his arms around Shiro’s body.

When he dreams of being held and kissed and fucked by Shiro, it’s _this_ Shiro.

Tonight, he tried to sleep, emphasis on _tried_. He slept for two hours and then was painfully jolted awake.

His dream started with gentle caresses and sweet kisses and then they quickly morphed into something awful.

In his dream he kissed Shiro’s nose, the scar, and suddenly everything disappeared.

He saw broken glass and blood. Scraps of metal. An outstretched arm trapped beneath something dark and heavy. And just out of reach of that hand, a small dark circle; A ring.

He wakes up with a start then, his heart hammering in his chest, all air from his lungs suddenly gone. He rolls over in his bed and shoves his face in his pillow and allows himself to cry and wallow, trying to keep his mind devoid of thought and meaning until his alarm clock goes off.

He meets Allura in her office before the sun even rises. They discuss the same project as they have the past few days.

The Voltron Project.

It’s a series of specialized motorcycles that her father had been brainstorming on before his death. Allura wants Keith to finish the designs and help her produce them. She thinks Voltron could be the key to reviving the whole business.

So they go over her fathers old notes together and Keith creates his own notes and he begins to sketch a couple test designs and then he erases things and makes more notes and redraws.

They push it a bit too long today, they go over the time but Keiths far too tired to notice the time, or where he is walking. When Keith finally steps out the front door of the office this morning, he runs straight into a brick wall instead of the cold dawn air. A really warm, soft to the touch but firm brick wall.

“Keith!” A voice gasps as gentle hands go to grip at his waist to steady him and all of a sudden Keith’s whole-body catches fire.

“Shiro!” He curses, instantly awake as he jumps back and away.

Sure enough, Shiro is blocking the office doorway. He’s wearing a baggy black hoodie which is definitely not in the business attire dress code and his hair is sticking out in thirty different directions and he’s got bags under his eyes that are heavy enough to get flagged for extra luggage fees at an airport.

In other words: he looks like shit.

But fuck if he isnt still beautiful to Keith.

“I-Keith, Im-“ Words start tumbling out of Shiro’s mouth, but nothing actually makes coherent sense and Keith is quick to stop him with a raised hand before he can actually say anything with meaning.

Shiro’s eyes are so dull and cold but he’s still looking at Keith with so much hope and adoration and love and if there’s ever a look that says ‘I am so sorry’, then this is it and by god if that’s not heartbreaking Keith doesn’t know what is.

“Don’t. Shiro… I can’t… I can’t do this right now.” He shakes his head, already feeling his chest tightening up. It feels like drowning, his lungs filling up with sorrow. He pushes past Shiro, and the mass of muscle moves fast and easy, not even bothering to try and block Keith from leaving, which Keith is very thankful for. Another minute in front of Shiro and he’d lose it.

He hightails it home, but not without a quick stop to the liquor store nearest to Keiths apartment to rid himself of all the pocket cash he’s got.

Allura rearranges their meeting schedule then. Instead of asking Keith to come in to meet her first thing in the morning, she asks Keith if he’s willing to come in late at night after everyone has left the building. He agrees to that, very thankful that she’s been so willing to work with him.

He doesn’t actually want to have to step into the building at all, but Allura is already doing so much to accommodate him that he hates to ask her to meet elsewhere.

So he spends the rest of his day drunk doodling designs and trying to think of anything that’s not Shiro. He fails. But for once it kind of works in his favor.

Allura’s dads idea for the Voltron designs was five different motorcycles each with a very specific ‘rider’ in mind. They were personality types. Most of the notes that he left are character traits.

The first one, according to Alfor, was to be ‘the leader’ and Keiths mind is going straight to Shiro right now.

Shiro is the most natural leader he’s ever seen. He’s strong and he’s sturdy when he needs to be for the sake of others, and he’s caring. He’s wise, he knows how to guide, and command other people and he knows how to take a control of a situation and handle it with ease.

So Keith works on and modifies the design with Shiro in mind. He designs something big and undoubtedly heavy, but he knows Shiro would have the strength and balance to handle it properly. He makes it as fast as he can with it’s heavy frame, knowing that Shiro, like him, is a bit of a speed demon. Keith also makes it as safe as he can, not just as for Altea protocol but also with the idea in mind that it would be Shiro driving this and god-forbidden something happens to Shiro while riding it.

Shiro would probably also prefer something in a sleek black paintjob.

Keith also remembers that Shiro’s favorite animal is a Lion, so Keith does a couple quick sketches on the margins of the page to work as possible decals.

He changes designs around and makes note of what he thinks Shiro would personally like, what fits his aesthetic and his comfort and all of a sudden Keith just freezes and stares at the sketch before him.

_Oh._

They wait for everyone to be gone from work the following day in order for Keith to sneak in and join Allura in her office.

“What are those” Keith stops instantly in her doorway, staring at the large vase of red flowers; Asters, Chrysanthemums, Carnations, Petunias, and of course roses. It’s an odd combination but he knows that’s not what matters. The bright, vibrant reds all radiate warmth and they call his name.

“Ah, Shiro left those for me to give to you” He knew it. Shiro’s the only person alive who knows that Keith secretly loves fresh flowers, and even more so knows him well enough to pick out said flowers.

He approaches the vase carefully, and finds a little note tied around the center.

**‘I hope you still like flowers.’**

It’s not signed, but it’s Shiro’s handwriting and he shaped the period at the end of the sentence like a little heart, just like he always used to do for Keith. Keith clutches the note tight in his hand and tries to steady his breathing before turning back to Allura, away from the flowers.

“Let’s get to work.”

He and Allura have a very brief discussion about Keiths plans for the Voltron project, and Keith leaves her office an hour later with the flower vase tight in his hands and Shiro’s work email written down on a sticky note that’s been safely secured in his pocket.

When he gets home, he sets the vase in his kitchen and is sure to give it a bit of fresh water. He doubts it’ll last long, most of the flowers are out of season but he’ll cherish them for as long as they’ll live. 

He pulls a beer from his fridge and sits down on his living room floor, Kosmo is quick to curl up behind him, and he pulls out his laptop.

**‘Shiro,**

**Attached are some designs and notes for the current Voltron project. Allura thought it best if you looked over what I have so far. Please get back to me whenever you have the chance.**

**Ps. Don’t you dare try to email me about anything that isnt work related or I’ll mark your email address as spam.**

**Ps. Ps. Yes, I do still like flowers; Thank you.**

**-Keith Kogane’**

* * *

Shiro stares at the email from his phone in amazement. He knows Allura didn’t ask Keith to send it to him. If she really wanted Shiro to look over it she would have forwarded it to him herself.

Keith had to ask for his email, he chose to do this himself.

Shiro can’t stop smiling. It’s a small step, but it’s a step in the right direction.

Shiro had a long talk with Matt yesterday, one that ended with Shiro formulating a very simple plan to get Keith back in his life.

He’s going to start by regaining Keith’s trust, and his friendship, the same way he did it the first time.

When they first met all those years ago, Keith didn’t want anything to do with Shiro. He avoided eye contact like it was the plague, he pretended he couldn’t hear Shiro anytime he tried to talk to him and would turn on his heel and head for the opposite direction if he saw Shiro approaching. But Shiro stayed still. He was enchanted by Keith’s mysterious personality and his easy beauty and decided he wanted to learn everything he could about Keith Kogane.

Shiro just kept trying, without forcing himself onto Keith. He made himself a stable presence, offering his friendship at any opprotunity that presented itself.

Eventually, it worked.

One day, Keith came to Shiro to very awkwardly ask for help studying.

Shiro got so excited that Keith had finally spoken to him let alone asked him for help that he might have gone a bit overboard. He met Keith at a coffee shop that afternoon looking like he had just robbed an office supply store. He brought everything he thought someone could possibly want for studying. He brought pens in every color he could find, four different kinds of pencils, erasers, an extra notebook, flashcards, five different colored highlighters, and three different kinds of sticky notes in addition to Shiro’s spare textbook on the subject and his laptop.

He also insisted on buying Keith a coffee and a snack, which Keith very cautiously excepted.

_“Is this all necessary?” Keith questioned. He just sort of stood in front of the table, eyeballing Shiro’s set up before slowly sliding into his seat._

_“I uh… I didn’t know what you’d want, and I wanted to be prepared…” Shiro had offered his truth. Keith then carefully selected out from Shiro’s supplies what he wanted. A simple black pen, a simple red pen and the notebook. Then he looked up at Shiro and offered him a small shy smile as he said: “Thank you”._

That’s the exact moment Keith stole Shiro’s heart.

His smile was breath-taking and as he and Keith talked, he realized that Keith had been avoiding him because Keith was skeptical of his behavior.

Apparently, No one had ever just been nice to Keith before.

He thought Shiro was being friendly to him so that he could lead Keith into some kind of prank or trap like something out of a bad teen movie. It never occurred to Keith that Shiro just wanted to be friends, because Keith had never actually had friends before.

From then on Shiro did everything he could to be the best friend that he could be to Keith. It’s what Keith deserved.

He let the friendship build up slowly, at a pace that was comfortable for Keith. He took whatever Keith wanted to give him, and never pushed for more, even after he had fallen hopelessly in love. He never pushed. He let Keith guide their relationship, was there when Keith needed him, only did what he thought would be best for Keith. And it worked.

Everyday he learned a little bit more about Keith.

Within the first week of them being friends Shiro learned that Keiths favorite color was red, that he drinks plain black coffee, loves dogs but has never had one.

He learned that Keith is actually a really good artist but refuses to admit to anything besides the little doodles he does in the margins of his class notes.

Keith told him that he grew up in a very small, barren desert town and he learned that Keith loves fresh flowers because of that one day when they were walking, and Keith quite literally stopped to smell the roses. Shiro surprised him the next day with a whole bouquet and Keiths smile that day was brighter than the sun.

Every day he stayed patient by Keiths side, being a stable presence, allowing Keith to open up at his own speed.

Every day he gained a little more of Keiths trust and his affection.

And he’s going to do it all over again, no matter how long it takes or what it takes.

He’s willing to work with Keith to get back to where they were.

If Keith doesn’t want to go back, then fine, he’ll take his defeat and eventually move on.

But he’ll stand by Keith and love him and support him for as long as Keith will let him.

‘ **I’ll look them over and get back to you first thing in the morning.**

**PS: I am glad you like the flowers.**

**-Shiro’**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Let me know what you think!  
> Follow me on tumblr @AuthenticallyVintageQueer


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Krolia drops Keith off at his apartment after what turned into a very silent dinner. He’s home no longer than five minutes before he’s jumping into an Uber with the nearest bar set as his drop off location.
> 
> It’s his usual spot, and it’s been a while since he’s been here, but the bartender knows what to sling him the second he steps inside the door anyway.
> 
> He gets in two shots and a bottle of his favorite malt liquor before he gets his hands on the biggest guy in the bar.
> 
> But it’s not Shiro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why am I posting this at midnight? I'd say because I've lost control of my life, but let's be real, I never had it under control to begin with. 
> 
> In which Keith has another revelation and Shiro gains a small victory

Shiro actually does Email Keith back almost right away, and again early in the morning.

Keiths eyes take in every word. And his heart thuds with each one that he reads, just knowing that it's Shiro that he’s talking tp.

And he gets very valuable feedback from him.

Shiro loves the direction Keiths taking the design in.

He loves the Lion head with the rainbow mane for a logo, and recommends they try to create more of a 'Lions Pride' cohesion for the whole line.

He also gives Keith the idea to try creating a gear line to go with it. Allura did want this line to be a big thing. And Shiro seems to think that Keith has the artistic talent to also design Voltron gear and merchandise to go with the bikes themselves. 

Keith actually isnt scheduled to into talk with Allura today, she’s busy with a lot of other meetings and so Keith takes this as a day off.

He goes out grocery shopping with his mom(mainly because she has an actual car to carry said groceries, and he does not) and loads up his shopping cart to the point that he thinks about going and grabbing a second cart. He probably looks like he’s feeding a family of ten.

His mom jokes that he looks like he’s getting ready for the apocalypse, and in an odd way, He is. In the case that he loses this job or has to quit because he can’t handle it, he’ll be well prepared. He already put some of his check into a savings account too, just in case.

Keith does keep a little extra money in his pocket so that he can take his mom out to dinner in celebration.

He owes a lot to her, and any chance he gets to pay he back, he does.

See, Keith’s mom left him as a baby. He grew up his entire life never even knowing her name or what she looked like. It doesn’t sound like he should be thankful, why should he be grateful to a parent that disappeared from his and is the root of his abandonment issues?

A couple months after Shiro had left, Keith found himself bouncing around from couch to couch and from job to job, struggling just to get by.

At his lowest point, Keith found himself in desperate need of shelter for the night. What he ended up finding was the Blade of Marmora Humanitarian Center. The team there was good to him. Well, they were good to everyone. But one of the volunteers spooked Keith in the middle of the night when he tried to wake Keith from a nightmare. Keith’s fight or flight response kicked in and of course, he chose fight. He had the poor volunteer pinned to his back in seconds flat. Instead of getting angry and kicking Keith out for his violent reaction, they thought it was funny as hell.

Apparently, they’re pretty used to people who choose to fight first and ask questions later. They’ve had a lot of war veterans in there shelter over the years. They’re totally used to accidental attacks.

What they are not used to is seeing a scrawny kid like Keith throw down an army vet twice his size while still half asleep.

They took a liking to Keith, and he started helping out around the center and different volunteers took turns letting Keith crash at their place.

Then one day Kolivan, the leader of the Blades, offered to have Keith stay at his house. Up until that day, Kolivan had avoided letting Keith crash with him. It was the only house Keith hadnt gone to and he could never figure out why. Kolivan loved him. Treated him almost like a son. Was constantly watching out for him at work, just never took him home.

 _“There’s someone I think you should meet”_ Kolivan had warned him before he stepped into the house. Keith didn’t know at all what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t to come face to face with a woman that essentially looked like an older, female version of him.

Kolivan was apparently an old friend of Keith’s mom, and had just been waiting to track her and bring her home.

Keith didn’t know what to do with himself at first. He was pissed, first of all. It was over whelming. He was a grown adult meeting his mom for the first time, the mom he assumed was dead from the way his father used to talk about her. That’s why he never tried looking.

Turns out his mom just had a lot of bad things going on in her life. She, much like the rest of the Blades of Marmora, was a soldier. She got sent oversea about a year after Keith was born. She was lost for a long time, and a prisoner of war after that. The army didn’t even try to find her, just declared her missing in action. By the time she was freed she had so much damage to her physical and mental health that she was stuck in a hospital there for years.

By the time she got home, Keith had already been in the foster system for years, and she couldn’t find him.

Not until the day Kolivan called her up and told her about the young man that had been working around the Center.

Krolia rushed over to their town of Arus. She’d been living on the other side of Galaxy County, just an hour away.

After meeting Keith and having a very long conversation with him about why she’d left and where she’d been and how she got back and Keith catching her up on what she missed, she offered to move for him. They got a little two-bedroom apartment together.

That lasted for about a little over a year, but they stayed close to eachother, neither one really willing to leave the other after all the time they’ve already lost.

They hang out nearly every day of the week, so long as they both don’t have work.

He’s been keeping her updated on everything that’s currently going on with him, since they have a very strict ‘honesty is the best policy’ rule between them.

“Why dont you just talk to him?" His mom asks, leaning her head on her hand. Its what Keiths come to know as the 'disapproving but understanding mom' look. She barely even waited for him to sit down at the table before she started the conversation Keith was waiting for. It’s all she’s been talking about for the last few days.

"Because it hurts. It hurts just looking at him. I dont know if I could handle actually talking to him face to face" he occupies himself by stirring the paper straw in his water cup, trying to avoid looking her in the eyes.

She's really only been his mom for very long, but she's got the telepathic mom skill down. 

"It hurts cause you care, Keith." She says in that extra soft and wise tone for when she's telling Keith something that she knows he doesn’t want to hear. She's right of course and he definitely doesn't want to hear it. He knows he still cares. Fuck he never _stopped_ caring. 

"I thought he died" he really didnt. Thats just what he told himself to feel better at night. Shiro was dead. Thats why he didnt come back. He didnt choose to leave. But deep down he knew Shiro was alive. He could feel it in his gut. But if Shiro was alive then he would have to assume that Shiro abandoned him on purpose. 

"You thought I was dead too" his mother ever so cleverly points out. "But you still heard my side of the story and forgave me. Why cant you do that for Shiro?" Krolia has made it very clear that she is 'Pro-Shiro'.

Keith told her the whole story long ago. And she loves the way that Shiro cared about and loved her son. Now that she knows he's alive she's eager to see her son that happy again. But Keith doesnt know if he can be that happy again, thats the thing.

"I’m scared of the truth..." he admits, even if he was willing to lie to her, he’s already learned the hard way that he’s very bad at it. "I am scared he's going to tell me that he really did leave me on purpose. That he found someone else. That he went off and got married to someone else. Or that he just wants to be friends now. I couldn’t handle that…"

His heart hurts just thinking about it. If Shiro moved on after, then Keith couldn’t blame him. He didnt exactly stay faithful himself. But it would still hurt him inside to know, and if Shiro left him for someone else in the first place? It'd kill him. 

"Do you really think he'd do that?"

He's thought about that so much. He thought about it for three years. He still thinks about it. 

"No.." he knows rationally that Shiro wouldn’t do that. Shiro is the one that suggested in the first place that they don't sleep with other people. Not date. No, he never asked Keith to officially date him, to be fair. But he did say he didnt want to sleep with more than one person at a time.

_"It's just you. That's it for me."_

That's what he told Keith and god was Keith eager to agree with that. 

He really doubts Shiro would cheat on him. Move on after a couple years? Yeah. Shiro is too beautiful and too amazing to stay single. There's no way. 

But the way he looks at Keith now. There's so much love in his gaze that makes Keith doubt it. 

Rationally? He doesn’t believe it.

But emotionally? He's still so hurt from the years of heartbreak that when he sees Shiro now all rational thought goes away and all thats there is just full, over-whelming emotional pain.

"I know sweetheart. I used to have the same thoughts about your father. It was so much worse to find him gone..." she takes a moment for a deep breath, collecting herself. Krolia told him that for her, it only feels like it’s been a couple years. Sometimes it’s hard for her to process that Keith’s dad… her husband…that he’s dead. Sometimes she has trouble processing the idea that Keith’s a grown man with his life (slightly) together.

“But it’s more painful to not know. Your father died not knowing that I was out there, alive and waiting for the day I could come back to him. It’s only fair to the both of you if you take the time to hear eachothers sides of the story. If he’s moved on, sweetheart, then oh well, you’ll move on someday too. But you can’t do anything till you find out the truth. Wouldn’t it be worse to see him move on years from now, after you realize that you had a chance to fix things and you passed it up? Wouldn’t it be worse living the rest of your life never really knowing what could have been? Ignorance isnt always bliss, Son.”

Krolia drops Keith off at his apartment after what turned into a very silent dinner. He’s home no longer than five minutes before he’s jumping into an Uber with the nearest bar set as his drop off location.

It’s his usual spot, and it’s been a while since he’s been here, but the bartender knows what to sling him the second he steps inside the door anyway.

He gets in two shots and a bottle of his favorite malt liquor before he gets his hands on the biggest guy in the bar.

But it’s not _Shiro_.

_It’s never Shiro._

Like always, he squeezes his eyes shut and tries his hardest to _pretend_ like it is Shiro.

But it doesn’t work this time.

He tries and he tries and he tries.

But this guy isnt as tall as _Shiro_.

He’s not as strong as _Shiro_.

His voice isnt as sweet as _Shiro’s_.

This guy doesn’t touch him the way _Shiro_ used to touch him.

 _It’s just not Shiro_.

And no amount of pretending is going to be able to fix that anymore.

* * *

It’s been a couple days since Shiro received an email from Keith. It had been going great for a while there.

It’s not like it was friendly conversation or anything, it was all work related, but it was conversation none the less and it was more than he was expecting in the first place.

Keith’s lack of emails the last two days doesn’t actually bother him. Not when he knows that Allura also has not been meeting with Keith. No work for Keith means no Shiro.

That breaks today though. Today Shiro gets a text as he’s on his way out the door of his apartment when he gets a text from Pidge:

**‘Keith just walked in.'**

Odd for him. Keith usually meets Allura when no one else is around, most likely trying to avoid a run in with Shiro.

But he has an opportunity now to see Keith. Hopefully for more than a second before Keith runs.

He rushes back into his apartment, desperate to make himself a tiny bit more presentable. There’s a difference between ‘presentable for your work-place’ and ‘presentable for facing the lost love of your life’ and right now he’s barely passing as presentable for work.

He changes to a dress shirt that’s significantly less wrinkled then the plain tee he was wearing before. It’s a dark charcoal gray, a color he knows Keith likes on him.

He brushes out his hair and combs it neatly back the way Keith used to like.

But will Keith still like that style on his now stark white hair?

He didn’t even think of that before. He stops and stares at himself in the mirror, comb frozen in his prosthetic hand as he inspects his reflection.

He’s not the same person as before. That much is obvious on the surface. He’s missing a whole limb. Would Keith be okay being touched and held and caressed by metal? Would Keith be okay feeling the map of scars that now coat Shiro’s body?

What about the not so obvious changes to Shiro? The one’s that arent physical? Would Keith even be willing to deal with Shiro’s nightmares? All the complications with his PTSD?

Would Keith be willing to love Shiro as he is now?

He begins to doubt himself. Maybe that is why Keith is running from him. Maybe Keith is repulsed by what he’s become.

But he quickly shakes those thoughts away.

Keith isnt that superficial. He’s not a shallow man. He trusts that Keith wouldn’t shun Shiro because of his physical appearance.

The emotional trauma is a whole different story, but there’s only one way to find out if Keith is willing to attempt trying to understand his trauma. 

He's getting ahead of himself. He needs Keith to stop hating him first before he should be worried about Keith loving him again. 

He shows up to work about forty-five minutes later, a nervous smile on his lips, and a to-go mug of Keith’s favorite coffee in one hand, a paper bag with Keith’s favorite breakfast sandwich inside in the other hand. Homemade, of course.

He’s just about to juggle his stuff around so he can knock on Allura’s door when it swings open and he’s suddenly face to face with a shocked Keith.

“Shiro!” Keith sucks in a sharp breath as he stares up at Shiro in bewilderment. Stares at him with those gorgeous violet eyes that put the stars themselves to shame.

To say Keith is as beautiful as they day he left would be a lie. Keith somehow has grown even more beautiful in there years apart and he didn’t think that was possible.

He catches something he didn’t before. A faded scar on the right side of Keith’s face. It’s a jagged triangle starting at the base of his jaw and stretching up towards his nose. It’s pale, well healed, but still clear, Shiro wonders how he didn’t notice it before. His hands burn with the curiosity and worry, desperate to touch and know about it.

“I uhm… I brought you coffee… and breakfast…” He holds up the offerings instead and Keith just stares at them in contemplation for a second. He eyes them, carefully, just like he did the very first time he met with Shiro to study. He scans the paper bag with suspicion, and then the coffee-cup to see if it was one of Shiro’s from home.

“You made them?” He asks after a second, slowly reaching up to take the gifts, very careful to not touch Shiro in the process, but their hands brush anyway when he takes the cup and he shivers at the sparks that flood his skin.

“Of course. One black coffee with a dash of cinnamon and a jalapeno cheese bagel with avocado, egg and bacon.” Shiro confirms, and his heart nearly pops out of his chest when Keith looks up at him through his thick lashes and offers him the tiniest of smiles.

“The Keith early morning special…” He jokes. The same thing Shiro always made him for breakfast, on the rare occasion that Keith was actually willing to wake up early enough to eat breakfast.

“Thank you, Shiro… I really needed this” Keith pulls the breakfast a little closer to his chest and his smile grows a bit more and even though he walks away rather quickly after that, Shiro still feels victorious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Let me know what you think! All kudos and comments are well appreciated! All your kind words and thoughts inspire me to keep going, and they always make my day!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He thought his meeting with Allura was bad. Well, it was good in terms of actual work, bad in terms of her teasing. He wasn’t actually uncomfortable or anything, but it was sort of embarrassing to be seen so clearly by someone he doesn’t actually know all that well.
> 
> But then he steps out of Allura’s office, only to get called out by someone he does know well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We get to meet a couple more members of 'Team-Shiro' and it's officially Keith's turn to give a gift

The best decision Keith’s made all week is waiting until he got home in order to enjoy the breakfast that Shiro brought him because one sip of that coffee and his brain gets fried by an overload of emotions.

It tastes exactly like it used to. It’s the perfect cup of coffee in Keith’s mine. It brings him right back to all the times Shiro woke him up with a gentle kiss to his temple, and a steaming mug in his hands ready to drown all Keith’s complaints about being awake too early. Keith would get to stay curled up in their warm bed with his coffee for a few more minutes and then Shiro would call him into the Kitchen once breakfast was ready.

Shiro’s breakfast sandwiches are about the only things he can cook for himself. And even those were less than edible the first few times he tried to make them. Something was always under-cooked while something else was burnt. Lucky for Shiro, Keith likes his food a little more on the crispy side. So eventually he got it to the point where everything was just a tiny bit burnt, perfectly to Keith’s liking. No one else would touch Shiro’s food, not even his roommate Matt.

Those morning with Shiro were probably the best in his life, though he did prefer waking up still in Shiro’s arms. Either way, it was rare for him to wake up without Shiro.

Now, every morning that he wakes up alone feels like a curse.

The next day Keith lays awake in bed for an hour before he manages to convince himself to get up. His mouth is dry, craving Shiro’s early morning remedy but he knows he probably won’t get it again today.

He told Allura that he’s willing to meet with her at regular business hours, like a more normal employee. He feels bad for her for having to work extra outside of her usual times just to accommodate him. He also knows that he can’t possibly hide from Shiro forever. He doesn’t want to hide from Shiro forever…

Today he’s meeting her at Nine AM, which somehow feels even earlier than when he was meeting her before the sun even rose. He trudges through his morning routine at the pace of a snail, unable to put any sense of urgency or excitement into his actions. Until he gets to Allura’s office, actually, and finds bright red thermos on her desk with a note attached.

**‘No time to cook this morning, I hope the coffee is enough.’**

He chugs half of it down in a second, desperate for the warm boost of energy it offers, while completely ignoring Allura’s knowing smile.

“I didn’t know Shiro could cook.” She teases, crystal eyes sparkling with amusement. It’s that same knowing tone that Krolia uses on him.

“That depends on your definition of ‘cooking’.” He shrugs, trying his best to keep a neutral expression as he holds the thermos close, appreciating the heat it radiates. It’s a new cup. Brand new. Keith can feel a price tag still attached to the bottom, which means Shiro probably went out and bought it specifically for him. He can feel his heart melting with each sip he takes.

“So, he really can only cook for you.” That’s how it used to be, and if the way she says it is any clue, she’s trying to tell Keith that he still doesn’t cook for anyone else. There’s no one in Shiro’s life like that. He’s single. Keith tries to hide his blush behind the thermos, but it ends up looking more like a color comparison.

He thought his meeting with Allura was bad. Well, it was good in terms of actual work, bad in terms of her teasing. He wasn’t actually uncomfortable or anything, but it was sort of embarrassing to be seen so clearly by someone he doesn’t actually know all that well.

But then he steps out of Allura’s office, only to get called out by someone he _does_ know well.

“Kogane! Come here and give me a hug, you little shit!” His head snaps at the call, only to find Mathew Holt down the hallway, an evil grin on his face and his arms tossed up into the air.

Matt looks different. Which is weird considering his younger sibling looks identical to how he used to look. Matt’s sure changed a lot, looks and all it seems. He’s bigger, and his hair has gotten longer, he’s got it up in a short ponytail which Keith never expected that to be a good look on Matt, but he actually works it well. There’s also a small faded scar spanning the vertical length of his cheek. His voice is also a bit deeper.

Keith didn’t expect to see Matt. He didn’t even know Matt worked here. He hasn’t seen him around, and he assumed if he did work here, he’d have sought Keith out by now.

“Oh hell no” he curses under his breath, quickly turning on his heel and walking in the opposite direction, which unfortunately is away from the front doors. There’s no way in hell he can handle Mathew Holt right now. He’s the only person besides him and Shiro who really knows what happened. He was the only one who was there for all of it.

“What!? No way! You can not be giving me the silent treatment too!” Matt however is just as stubborn as Keith.

“Goodbye, Matt!” He calls out, giving a half-assed wave, but Matt follows after him anyway, a couple steps behind Keith because he can’t quiet keep up with Keiths walking speed.

"Come on, Keith, talk to me dude!" Keith makes it to the safety of the break room before stopping and spinning around to face Matt. 

"No. Matt. I am not gonna talk to you about it" he snaps, not at all caring that the break room is occupied. There’s only four people. Allura’s assistant Romelle, The lead Mechanic Hunk, Matt’s little sister and the lead Engineer Pidge and the incredibly annoying head of Marketing Lance.

"Why not?" Matt stops in front of him and crosses his arms. He's blocking the door. It's an attempt to subtly intimidate Keith. Sure, He’s an inch taller then Keith remembers and he's actually got real muscle now instead of noodles for arms. The scar on his cheek looks sort of rugged. But Keiths also grown, Matts only an inch or two bigger, but Keith knows he could still kick Matts ass with ease.

"Cause anything I tell you, you're just gonna run and repeat to Shiro"

"No I am not! Bros before Shiro’s" he tries. Keith just rolls his eyes. Sure, they did used to be pretty good friends. In the beginning, Keith thought that Matt was going to get jealous and upset over Keiths growing friendship with Shiro and end up hating him, much like Shiro’s other friends. Instead, Matt decided to jump on the Keith bandwagon. Matts roommate had a new best friend and Matt embraced that. He started tagging along to Keith and Shiro’s movie nights and he snuck into their study sessions. The first time was awkward but Shiro made a great buffer and it eventually became easier. After a while, Keith felt comfortable enough to hang out with Just Matt.

He'd start waiting for Shiro in his apartment, instead of his own dorm or at a public spot nearby. He'd wait for Shiro to get out of class and work by chilling in the living room and playing video games with Matt.

They were good friends, but still…

"Shiro was your friend first. We both know thats where your loyalty lies" Keith accuses. It’s not a bad thing. He is actually happy to see that Matt is still by Shiro’s side, sticking up for him. 

"Okay. You got me. That's fair. He asked me to talk to you. On a personal note though; I happen to miss you too" Matt huffs, and Keith falters.

He wasn’t expecting this part. He knew he and Matt were friends but he didnt think Matt held his value the same way. 

"...I missed you too" he admits. Because he does, and because he doesn’t want to leave Matt hanging.

"You know we didnt mean to leave you, right? It wasn’t on purpose. But by the time we were able to look for you had kind of disappeared. The last thing Shiro ever wanted was to leave you" Matt sighs and Keiths head suddenly filled with images of his dream from a couple nights ago.

"Car accident... it was a car accident, right?" Matt just solemnly nods and Keith sighs. "I know it wasn’t by choice. I know that now. But that can’t take away the three years of pain I went through" Keith shakes his head. "I am not... I am not mad at Shiro. Not anymore. I just…I got hurt. I am _still_ hurt. And I still need time to heal" Matt seems to finally give in, looking at Keith with sad and sympathetic eyes.

"Okay. I get it... and just so you know, Saturday night is still movie night. You’re welcome to join is if you’re ever feeling down for it." Matt steps away from the doorway with a small smile, finally letting Keith leave. It’s nice to know tradition still stands. Their Fridays used to be devoted to getting as drunk as possible at whatever party or bar was most convenient at the time. Then on Saturday they’d spend the whole day recovering, doing nothing all afternoon but lay on the couch and eat and watch movies all together. Sundays of course were for rushing to finish whatever responsibilities they had neglected before their weekend of freedom was over. It’s nice to know that for them some semblance of their normal lives remained. For Keith… Well Keith’s weekends before this job were nothing but Fridays.

"Good to know." he nods, glancing behind Matt at the door... But he hesitates. 

"And you know. If you ever want to talk about non-Shiro related things, my number is still the same" Matt offers, and Keith can't help but smile. He offers his hand out in return, and Matt takes it with a grin on his face as he tugs Keith into a hug.

* * *

Shiro has been bringing Keith coffee for the last three days now. The smile Keith gave him this morning when he handed him the travel mug set Shiro’s insides on fire. Keith still hasn’t said much too him. Just a ‘thank you’ so far today. But when Shiro walks out of his office at the end of the day, he’s pleasantly surprised to find Keith waiting for him in the break-room with the others.

“Lance, shut up before I break your mouth” Is what Shiro walks into and he can’t help but laugh. That sure is his Keith alright. The sound of his laugh alerts the others quickly to his presence.

Keiths pops up from his spot on the couch and awkwardly makes his way across the room to Shiro, a sweet blush on his cheeks and his arms filled with a large paper bag.

“I uh…” Keith stops right in front of Shiro and clears his throat, eyes glues to the floor. “I uhm, I was helping out in the kitchen and it was such a big batch and I know it’s your favorite, so I thought I’d bring you a bit.. there’s uhm, some cookies in there too… Those ones might have stolen a couple, but there’s plenty…” Keith rushes it all in a big rush, and Shiro glances over Keiths head to see Lance, Hunk, Pidge, Matt and Romelle sitting in the lounge, munching on homemade cookies.

“I didn’t know you could bake” is the first thing he manages to say, eyes drifting down the bag that Keith has now shoved into his hands.

“Well, I learned” Keith still refuses to look him in the eyes. It looks like he’s about to say something else when an unfamiliar voice calls out.

“Kitt! There you are! What’s taking so long?” Keith’s head whips up and Shiro turns around to find Coran escorting someone in. A man, their age, with black hair and narrow eyes. He’s a bit taller than Shiro, but very thin.

“Regris! You were supposed to stay in the car!” Keith grows, stepping quickly away from Shiro. Shiro’s stomach drops. _‘Kitt’?_ Is Keith… Is Keith dating someone?

“You were taking too long. Just be happy Krolia didn’t come in. She was nearly clawing at the door to come in and meet Shiro” The man teases, and that has Shiro’s attention. Who is this man? Who is ‘Krolia’ and why does she sound eager to meet Shiro.

“Oh my god, okay, I am coming. Get back in the car.” Keith groans, shooing the man away. There doesn’t seem to be any romantic vibes between them. And he supposes a romantic partner would be more apprehensive about meeting an ex like this.

“What? But I am already here and I’v prepared my threatening big-brother speech and everything” The man complains, but his voice lacks any sense of amusement or humor.

Keith groans louder. “Okay. No. No. Bye, Shiro! Enjoy the Mac N Cheese!” Keith leaves his side to start trying to shove his friend out of the building.

Shiro is just left standing their in the break room, favorite meal in hand, homemade by the love of his life, and an absolutley ridiculous grin on his face as his friends laugh at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's a bit shorter of a chapter, and I was really struggling with Shiro's part, so I left it at something simple.  
> Ps: I really love Matt. He's my favorite character after Shiro and Keith, obviously. He doesnt get enough attention and it saddens me.   
> I hope you guys like it, let me know what you think!  
> Talk to me on tumblr! I do also take requests if there's something specific you want to see out of this au!  
> Also, I am sorry but this isnt Beta-read. So if there's any mistakes? Oh well it's midnight and my head hurts.  
> If someone is actually interested in beta-ing I would not be opposed, hit me up !  
> and Happy New year!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I'll be waiting"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Progress!

“No”, Keith repeats, wary, for what feels like the thousandth time. He didn’t start off the day expecting such an onslaught of harassment from his co-workers, but nothing about today seems to have gone to plan. As of this morning, Keith has received exactly seventeen emails from Pidge, thirty texts from Lance, a talk slightly awkward talk from Hunk, and a rather forceful conversation from Matt. All spent convincing him to join the group for lunch. Keith figures if they put in as much effort into persuading him as they put into their work, he’s joined a reliable establishment.

Lance had tried to convince him that it was some sort of ‘Mandatory Work-Place Bonding’, but Keith spent that conversation more concerned about how he got ahold of his phone number. Allura was supposed to keep all his information private and well hidden so that Pidge couldn’t get ahold of it and sell it off to Shiro, but if she’s anything like her brother she probably got into Allura’s system days ago.

Pidge’s tag line via E-Mails were rather entertaining as they progressed though, giving Keith a reason to laugh through this morning. The first couple remained professional, running along the lines of ‘To Keith: Lunch’ slowly transforming into mild threats such as ‘If you don’t respond to any of my E-mails I will post __’ and ‘Answer me you dickwad’. Content remained the same, simply asking (read: threatening) him into coming. The most recent one he opened actually held a fairly hefty Pro’s and Con’s list, which he admits was very impressive. He knew Matt and Shiro had probably given her a vague idea of the past, but Pidge was nothing if not persistent. She needed to hear the story for herself, by any means necessary. Or as she put it, she “wants to see what all the fuss is about.”

Hunk was the only one smart enough to appeal to the bottomless pit that is Keith’s stomach. As Keith obtained a third cup of coffee from the break room, Hunk spent the time wistfully, and very pointedly reminiscing about how he would bring leftovers from his old work-place for the others, describing in great detail the flavors and spices he used most in the recipes. It was an attempt to make Keith hungry and desperate enough to agree to a lunch trip, and it nearly worked.

Matt is the winner though. No amount of clever or persistent persuasion could beat that knowledge that that Shiro won't be attending the lunch. His morning is filled with meetings and has asked them to bring him back his usual, completley unaware that Keith was being dragged along in his stead.

Matt also threatened to show the others (Shiro included) pictures from Keith's first house party, which is when he also learned how to do a keg stand for the first time. Pictures that Keith swore he burned long ago.

He's both shocked and appalled that Matt would still have such black mail. He makes the deal with Matt to go to lunch _if_ Matt deletes all the copies he has of those cursed images. 

So, after his typical morning meeting with Allura, he sketches some quick doodles of the office while he waits for the others to finish up work. One by one, they trickled in and by the time the last one entered, they were all engaged in idle chatter. All five of them pile into hunks 'practical and very safe' mom van, the only vehicle able to comfortably carry them. Keith always rode his Dad’s classic 1970 Triumph Bonneville. Matt and Pidge carpool with Shiro every day or take public transit, and Lance, while owning a small durable 1982 Chevrolet Camaro Sport Coupe, he was the least trusted driver of them all. Which left Hunk to be the designated driver for most events. They take Keith to the little diner down the street: Sal’s.

Apparently, Hunk used to work there back in the day. Beginning as a part time employee, his work and dedication reformed and revived the place right before Allura swooped in and recruited him. 

They all herded themselves into a booth together, and there’s an uncomfortable silence for a few minutes as everyone besides Keith pretends to look at the menu.

“So…” Lance begins, “You and Shiro, huh?” Keith squeezes the bridge of his nose, feeling the beginnings of a migraine coming on; he should have seen this coming.

“Can we not do this?” He just wants to pick out the juiciest burger Hunk had recommended earlier that day. He had spent precious time daydreaming about the flavor profile only to have all taste turn bitter in his mouth. He should have known better than to think he could avoid the subject.

“Come on, dude!” Lance whines, slapping his menu down. He knew no one was actually engaged in reading the menu due to the fact that half the table had them upside down. Plus, they’ve all been here long enough to know what they want beforehand. “We’re all dying of curiosity over here. Shiro won’t give up anything!”

“And I won’t tell them anything because I know you’d track me down and kill me in my sleep if I told them without your permission.” Matt speaks up next to him, shrugging awkwardly and almost smacking Pidge in the shoulder in the slightly the cramped space. Again, Matt proves to be the smartest.

“But we’re all concerned about you guys! We’re just trying to understand the situation.”

“So spill the tea, Keith!”

Keith hesitates, looking around the table in confusion, unsure of what they’re asking. Who ordered tea, much less was reckless enough to spill it ?

“Just tell them the story, what happened with you and Shiro,” Matt clarifies for him. Okay, that makes sense. But still, he’s not so sure about pouring his sob story on the table for people he barely knows.

“No details, please,” Lance interrupts his contemplation, begging with his nose scrunched up in disgust. “I’m still having trouble coming to terms with the fact that Shiro’s type is lanky emo boys. I really don’t need the details of your guy’s relationship or whatever.” He visibly shivers at the idea, exaggerating his discomfort. Which is exactly why Keith leaves in a couple said details when he finally caves and tells them his side of the story.

He tells them about how he and Shiro met. How at first, he thought Shiro was just some frat dude trying to make fun of him. He tells them about the transition from Friendship to Fuckbuddies. He tells them about seeing Shiro off at the airport, with longing kisses and promises to call as soon as he can. About the unnerving panic of knowing the flight should have landed three hours ago but never receiving a call or even a text. He tells them about how he spend every day for weeks checking in with Colleen Holt to see if she’d heard anything from her son or her husband. Keith was glued to his phone for what felt like forever, constantly waiting for it to ring. He tells them about the rumor that started around the school, that Keith’s breaking point was one of Shiro’s ex’s posting a memorial photo online.

He leaves it at that. He figures they don’t need to know everything, and it’s hard enough to retell his story as all the painful memories come flooding back to him.

-

_This party isn’t Keith’s first rodeo. He’s been to house parties before. He has a couple ‘friends’ from class that like to drag him along any time there’s something going on. Mainly because the girls feel safe around him and they use him to make sure no one tries to mess with them. For him it’s just free booze. He doesn’t actually care for parties; He doesn’t particularly like the people, or the loud music. He just sits in the corner, plays on his phone and nurses whatever drink doesn’t taste like rubbing alcohol until the girls say they are ready to leave._

_After playing Candy Crush for a full hour, Keith gets bored and finally shut off his phone to get some air. The porch was relatively empty, shockingly. He took in a deep breath and leaned on the wood, staring out into the dim city skyline, admiring what little he could see of the starts above._

_A door quietly shutting behind him forced him to turn his head, coming to face to face with a literal Greek god. Too bad, said Greek god was dressed like the most stereotypical frat boy._

_“Hey man, needed a break ?” Keith grunts noncommittally. Even though his dick was telling him to go for it, he knew he wasn’t going to be able to stand conversation about hot sorority girls again, he hasn’t had nearly enough to drink for that._

_“Listen, I’m not interested in talking to annoying frat boys so I’d suggest you leave while you can.” The man didn’t hesitate, seemingly undeterred_

_“If that’s what you’re avoiding, then why would you hang around here?” He gestures to the house._

_“Got dragged along by some classmates.” A beautiful chuckle escaped from the man before he extended his hand in greeting._

_“I’m Shiro... I am actually in one of your classes… Keith, right?”_

_Keith’s eye’s widened. How had he never noticed this walking wet dream before? and why was Shiro even talking to him?_

_“Right.”_

_-_

_The first shot had seemed like a grand idea. Midterms had just finished up last week, every student either partying themselves into week-long comas or already hibernating for Thanksgiving break. The weather had turned bitter, Fall ending and Winter creeping up before anyone was ready. The second and third shot were afterthoughts, the movie playing mindlessly while Shiro and Keith chatted, laughing over their shared mishaps of the first quarter. The living room had been transformed into a half hazard sleep fort in which there were more blankets than actual surface area. Both of them buried underneath a single blanket, Keith’s knees spread across Shiro’s lap. The couch was surprisingly large for such a small dorm yet neither of them felt the need to be any further than a few feet from each other._

_“I couldn’t look either of them in the eyes after that!” Shiro exclaims, throwing his arms up in defeat,“ How do you recover from finding out the kid who sat next to you almost every day has a twin! Two different classes with, apparently, two different people!” Keith was in hysterics, choking on his own laughter. His cheeks were flushed, a combination of the Vodka and exertion._

_He had heard part of this story before, but no matter how many times Shiro retold a story, Keith would be just as fascinated as the first time. Yet, as the alcohol increased, Keith’s sense of higher brain function had ceased, his horny brain simply staring at Shiro’s chest, direly wishing to skim his hands underneath his shirt. It had already ridden up from their cackling, revealing the slightest bit of his abdominals, rock hard even after demolishing most of the pizza. Shiro split his time between class, hanging out with friends, and hitting the gym. Working out was Shiro’s response to everything: stress, fatigue, boredom. You name it. And it showed._

_Keith licked his lips, downing another shot before realizing a soft silence had filled the room. Shiro was staring back at him, unknown emotions hidden behind his eyes._

_They had been friends for a little over a year at this point, and every moment had been a slow torture for Keith who was always two seconds away from being ready to strip for Shiro. He wanted Shiro to wreck him, claw his hands down his sides, leave hickeys so everyone would know he was taken. He would get on his knees for Shiro in front of a classroom if that’s what it would take. Keith was always thirsty for Shiro._

_Keith, the horny part of his brain acting out, clambered onto Shiro’s lap, straddling him as he hooked his arms around his neck. It wasn’t long before they both pushed together, lips pressing in haste. Shiro tasted of cheap vodka, maneuvering his tongue into Keith’s mouth. The desire to be closer, to push things further, caused Keith to travel down his neck, nibbling into the soft skin of his neck If he had one goal, it would be to put as many hickies as humanly possible on a person._

_His nails dug into his scalp. Small grunts echoed around the room, Keith feeling pressure rapidly building below his stomach when anxiety suddenly swelled up. What if Shiro didn’t want this ? He’s too nice to say anything...yet before any more doubt could flood his alcohol fuddled brain, he could feel pressure against his inner thigh. He rolled his hips against it immediately, chasing the sensation._

_“Keith...” Shiro whispered into his ear, nipping at the lobe. Pleasure sparked down his spine. The noises escaping Keith’s mouth could only be described as soft whimpers of pleasure, but he would deny such statement down the line. When it became unbearable, Keith shoved his hand down Shiro’s pants and firmly grasped his aching dick. Shiro’s grunts were cut off with a choked moan of pleasure._

_Barely a week later, no alcohol involved, Keith would sink to his knees in front of Shiro, taking his hard cock into his mouth and swirling his tongue around the tip. They only had half an hour before Matt would return from class and Keith intended to spend every second of it sucking Shiro’s soul out through through his dick._

_It wasn’t long before it was an almost daily occurrence, alternating between study nights and hanging out with Matt as a group. Snow was drifting to the ground slowly, the lights outside giving a soft hazy glow to the room. The dorm’s electricity was out, the alarm clock showing a soft 12:32 p.m. Classes had been cancelled for the next few days due to unexpected weather and in the days since, Shiro and Keith had barely left the dorm, keeping warm by the sheets and shared body heat._

_“God, you’re gorgeous, Keith.” Shiro murmured into his left thigh as his fingers stroked the inside of Keith, pressing repeatedly against his prostate. If he were coherent, he might shove Shiro’s shoulder playfully and laugh, but that possibility went out the window three orgasms ago. Keith’s cock dripped into a puddle building onto his lower stomach. He had become sticky over time but nothing could stop him from preventing Shiro from finishing the task at hand. The tip flushed red angrily, ready to release but Shiro was waiting. He knew he could pull at least one more orgasm out of Keith before touching him, giving him the release, he waited so patiently for. Tears dripped silently onto the sheets; Keith’s body overwhelmed in a way that was close to pain. But Keith asked for this. He asked for Shiro to wreck him, and he’s being granted exactly that._

_Shiro’s hands wiped away each tear, cooing softly and praising Keith with soft, gentle words._

_“My good boy, you’ve done so well, my Starlight. Just give me one more and I’ll fuck you, give you what you’ve wanted, ok ? One more...” Keith’s noises grew louder, a constant string of begging slurred together. Once again, the familiar tingle at his spine began building, more rapidly than before, slightly scaring him. He whined, struggling as much as he could to both pull away and chase it simultaneously. He heard someone screaming, begging in a voice that sounded like his but was unable to even feel anything but blinding pleasure. Before it could even finish, Shiro pushed into him rapidly, fucking Keith like his life depended on it._

_Keith’s hands clawed down his back, sure to leave scratch marks for days. His lungs grew hoarse, but he was unable to stop shrieking, especially when a solid hand began to stroke his aching, deprived cock. In a fluttery haze, Keith blinked his eyes open to see Shiro encouraging him. He was cognizant he was speaking but white noise had built to such a volume it was impossible to decipher._

_-_

_1:30 p.m. Shiro’s flight wasn’t for another three hours. Keith had chosen to drive The Holts and Shiro to the airport, dropping them off before their long flight to Japan. Shiro had been ecstatic about this trip, retelling stories about growing up with his grandfather, but Keith grew more melancholic as it approached. It would be a long time before he saw Shiro and Matt again, meaning Keith was on his own. Keith was used to spending all his time in solitude before he met Shiro and he wasn’t fond of those memories. Isolation. Feeling alone forced him to become a recluse, angry at the world and bitter. Yet, Shiro looked past that, pushed past it to know what Keith was really like, and Keith could not have been more grateful. If it wasn’t for him, Keith would most likely be in a much worse place mentally and physically._

_Slowing the car to a stop in front of the terminal, he helped everyone remove their luggage from the car. A quick hug and wave goodbye had The Holts leaving Keith and Shiro some private time to say their goodbyes._

_“I’m going to miss you,” Keith murmured, pressing his hand against Shiro’s chest, feeling the soft heartbeat under his sweater. He’d miss lying on his chest, falling asleep to the soft, even beat. It’s his absolute favorite sound._

_“I’ll call you as soon as we land, alright ?” A small peck to his cheek turned into an intense make out session, hands desperately gripping one another. A woman nearby clearing her throat brought them back to the present._

_“I’ll be back before you know it, Starlight.” A few more small and hushed words were exchanged before Keith would have one last look at Shiro’s back, the last he’d see of him for a long time. Longer then he expected/_

_-_

_Waking up groggy, Keith managed to stumble into the bathroom, vomiting whatever little bit of food and bottles of alcohol from the night before. The past few hours were hazy, but Keith knew the routine his brain had forced him into for the past few weeks. Suffer through his shitty job, buy some alcohol on the way home from work, stare at old photos of him and Shiro and cry himself to the point of exhaustion._

_He knew from previous experience that if he spent his day in and out of sleep, his nightmares would hike up his anxiety to a point where he wouldn’t leave his room for days on end. He checked his phone again before his battery died, checking the latest reply from Mrs. Holt. Again, no word from anyone. It’s been months at this point, contacting anyone he could to see if they knew something only to be stuck at a dead end. He still remembers that day clearly, waiting for his phone to ring, waiting to hear Shiro’s chipper voice retelling how the trip went and how his grandfather had been doing. It wasn’t until three hours after their set landing time had he began to worry. No text, no calls, nothing for months. The amount of panic attacks he endured after accidentally finding an old shirt of Shiro’s was too many to count at this point. He knew Shiro wouldn’t leave him, he had promised he wouldn’t be like everyone else. He had promised._

_-_

_He was alone._

_-_

-

He doesn’t speak of the endless nights of torturing himself via alcohol and hours staring at a blank wall, yet he couldn’t prevent his brain from regurgitating the memories anyway. A small grimace plastered onto his face before someone broke his hazy trance.

“Wait, go back for a second…” Matt interrupts, spraying a few French fries across the table before he could finish chewing. He takes another moment to swallow, thankfully.

“Did you just refer to you guys as being ‘Friends-with-Benefits’? Seriously?” They stare at one another in confusion, both lost in the others statement.

“He never actually asked me out. I tried bringing it up when it all started but he said he didn’t want anything to change between us. He said everything was good the way it was, so I thought that meant he didn’t want any pressure of being labeled boyfriends.” God, Keith remembers the heart attack that came with that conversation. He hadn’t objected because he was so afraid of losing Shiro. If a label mattered to him that much, he wouldn’t push it.

“Christ, you are both oblivious idiots...” Matt mumbles to himself, rolling his eyes in annoyance, but offers no further explanation.

“I’ve got a question” Pidge interrupts, “Who was that guy that picked you up yesterday? And why did you bring Shiro food?”

“Well, Shiro has been bringing me coffee every morning, and sometimes breakfast… I volunteer at a local shelter, and we were having a celebratory potluck thing. I just wanted to return the favor and bring him something. The guy that picked me up is a friend who works at the shelter.” 

“So...you are single?” Lance asks, pointedly, obviously asking for Shiro’s sake.

“Yes, I am single,” he sighs. There’s no point in trying to hide it.

“Are you ever actually going to talk to Shiro?” Pidge asks, and Hunk nods in agreement. “He looks like he’s going to explode every time he sees you.”

“We get your side and all, trust me, we do. But it’s really painful to see him like this.” They all had observed the bags under his eyes, how his hair was constantly ruffled from running his fingers through it in stress.

“I will,” Keith swears. He really will. Eventually. He just doesn’t know when. “I just… I still need time.”

After that conversation had died down, it wasn’t long before playful bickering and jokes were tossed around over food. Banter and teasing filled the time until they all had finished eating and were ready to return to work.

Upon returning, havoc seemed to have broken out within the past hour, requiring an essential personal meeting ASAP. They quickly filed into the meeting room, already featuring Coran, Romelle, and Shiro. Allura stood at the front of the table, seemingly weighed down by whatever stressor that had shown up. After giving a quick rundown, Keith finally learns why Allura has been pushing so hard for the Voltron Project.

“The Galra have somehow caught wind that we’re planning something that can change the future of our company and I don’t want any more information to get out. I haven’t disclosed how vital this project is to everyone here, but we need Voltron to succeed in order to save the company. This could revive our entire business. This project has been in the works for years, ever since my father first brought it up to me, but I wasn’t able to gather a team good enough to go through with it until recently. Zarkon got word of this and is planning to move up his sale deal discussions with Oriande, Diaibazaal, and Olkarion .”

Allura glanced over to Keith quickly, “I know I haven’t filled you in completely, but the general issue is that if Zarkon can get these deals to go through, we’ll lose our best manufacturers. We can’t keep with the prices they’re offering. Even if we managed to somehow match them, he’ll double them before we could ever sign anything. My father has learned all his cheap tricks before.”

Allura turns back to address the group, “No one outside this room is allowed to know anything about this project, and everything concerning Voltron will directly be handled by one of us until it is officially announced. Galra inc. is not above playing dirty, and they will put us out of business if they succeed,” she warns. The tension in the room drastically rises.

Allura faces herself towards Keith but he has a feeling he already knows what she is going to ask.

“Keith… I know you-” She begins, a regretful emotion passes over her face. He knows she hates asking this, but she’s an incredible businesswoman and she needs to find out everything she can. Even if it means asking the hard questions.

“No, I am not in contact with anyone from The Galra Empire and have not been for many years now,” he interrupts. Shaking his head, the tension in her shoulders relaxes a miniscule amount. One more person she can confide with instead of hiding away from for the sake of work. He’s not upset or even surprised that she’d accuse him. If the roles were reversed, he’d act no differently. The rival company had been on Keith’s resume when he applied, and now the project he’s heading the design on could make or break Galra inc.’s take over.

“Hold on? You worked for Galra?” Lance snaps, more snark in his tone than anger or betrayal.

“Hardly,” he scoffs. “I was an intern for a couple months until I realized that they’d never actually promote a college dropout and were just going treat me as a cheap secretary and errand boy. I drew the line when someone jokingly asked me where my pencil skirt was. I’d rather eat my own fist then work with them ever again.” The sound of something smacking the table grabs his attention, and his eyes snap over. Shiro’s shoulders are tense, metal arm squeezed into a fist as he glares at the table.  
“You dropped out of college?” he asks softly, strained. When they were together, Shiro had been very protective of Keith. Any sign of flirting, belittlement, or judgement was shut down in his presence, leading to cute possessive hand holding. When he thinks about it now, it reminds Keith of when he tries to take Kosmo’s food bowl before he’s finished eating. Hearing Keith be treated in such a manner probably wasn’t easy for him, but they weren’t together anymore, so he probably felt out of place in voicing his opinion. It’s most likely that’s not the original reason he snapped but Keith wouldn’t ask.

“No point in staying...” Keith whispered more to himself than to anyone else; he instantly regretted it. He sees the hurt that sparks in Shiro’s cold eyes and recoils immediately. He knew Shiro would never dare to dream of hurting him, but the emotional turmoil wasn’t something he was ready to deal with today. He wants to speak up but Allura, noticing the discomfort, loudly clears her throat to bring everyone back on track.

“Thank you, Keith, but I am well aware you wouldn’t betray us for Galra inc. I distinctly remember on your resume, under reasons for leaving your previous job, you wrote ‘They’re all fucking asshats’.” She laughs, grinning at him and he nods slowly, making a mental note to never write a resume while drunk again. “Honestly, part of the reason I hired you was because that note made me laugh for a good hour.”

“It’s true,” Coran interceded jubilantly, “ I became concerned for her health after the first half hour but she just shoved your resume into my hands and let me read it myself. I ended up laughing with her!” Smiling fondly, he pulled at the tips of his bright orange, perfectly trimmed mustache. He wasn’t sure what products he used, but his mustache seems to defy gravity, it reminds Keith of an old cheesy cartoon.

“I may have been a bit drunk when I applied...” he admits, which shockingly earns more laughter from the table. Keith glanced over to Shiro to notice how he was the only other person, excluding Keith, who didn’t join in the humor. Keith flushed in shame.

“I figured that was the case… I was actually going to ask if you knew anything useful about Galra inc. Since you said you were with them for a while, you could give us insight on how they work and help us stop them from infiltrating Voltron again?” Oh. That’s much better than being accused of being a mole.

“Yeah. I unfortunately spent enough time around corporate sleaze-bags to figure out the basics of their business.” He sees Shiro wince out of the corner of his eyes. Keith can already guess how Shiro is fearing the worst of Keith’s past situation, but Keith continues on anyway, “Like you said, they’ll play dirty. Pidge and Matt will need to make sure all of our digital communication isn’t being traced or hacked. You’re already on the right track with limiting who you communicate with for the time being. Even after Voltron is announced publicly, they’ll try to save themselves by ripping off our ideas, so it’ll have to be necessary personal until it’s on the market. They’ve paid off small technicians and interns before; check for anyone in financial difficulty – who would take a bribe ? All work should be done and kept safe and well-guarded somewhere. I’m pretty sure they’ve also committed low crime robberies before to obtain blueprints, so up night security,” he murmurs. Shiro is probably not far off in his wild assumptions that Keith was eye candy for more than a few people there, and he knew it. He sat on a couple desks, unbuttoned his shirt just one button too many. Instead of learning valuable methods in corporate business and design, he was learning how to sell his body rather than his ideas. He was looking for a career, not some sugar daddy.

“That’s all manageable. I’ll have Pidge and Matt begin working on digital security later today. For now, I think a Mandatory Team Building meeting would be nice.” Any stress dissipated in the air; a collective sigh of relief filled the conference room.

“Hell yes! It’s my turn to pick the movie!” Lance cheers, bolting out of his chair and the meeting room before anyone can react.

“I’ll start on the snacks!” Hunk joins in.

“And We’ll make sure Lance doesn’t choose anything stupid” Pidge quickly picks up the chair Lance let fall to the ground then follows Matt and Shiro out the door.

“I’m sorry, what just happened?” He asks, scanning the empty room, consisting of just him and Allura.

“I forgot how strange it is for new employees to hear our little traditions...On the rare occasion the team finds itself in desperate need of a morale booster, we all settle into the break room and watch a movie together. It’s Mandatory Team-Building.” She says, leading him out of the room.

“I thought Lance was fucking with me...” He mutters. Lance had mentioned something about Team Building earlier, but he thought that was just Lance trying squeeze out info about Shiro.

“Coran and Lance were the ones to suggest that we invest some time for the team to bond and become comfortable with one another. I know I said it’s mandatory, but if you’re honestly uncomfortable, you’re don’t have to entertain Lance’s fantasies…” she trails off, a small understanding smile crossing her features.

“No, it’s alright. I’m part of the team now, right? So, I shouldn’t keep avoiding everyone,” he agrees. A gnarly twist in his stomach warned him that he wasn’t making the right decision, but what harm could come from a movie ? He could deal with an hour and a half of sitting in a room with Shiro. He should be fine.

Allura, holding the door open for him, revealed the Break Room. It wasn’t until he took his first steps in did he fully realize his mistake. The only open seats are next to Lance and next to Shiro, and Allura happily claims the seat beside Lance before Keith could even contemplate which torture he was willing to endure.

So, he makes his silent death march across the room, well aware that everyone is watching him out of the corner of their eyes as they pretend to discuss the movie choices.

“If this isn’t okay, I can make Matt switch with me,” Shiro whispers to him as he attempts to make himself comfortable. The feeling of having Shiro so close after so many years apart is not entirely welcomed. Keith can feel his warmth radiating off him and Shiro’s breath softly brushes against his ear and sends hot shivers down his spine.

“It’s alright…” he lies, trying his best to subtly put as much distance between himself and Shiro as he can. Shiro rigidly adjusts himself back up and shoves himself as far as he can into the corner of the couch for Keith’s sake.

Unfortunately, Matt occupies his other side, and when he leans more into Matt’s space to try and get away from Shiro, Matt’s squirrely tendencies force him to shove himself right back. Matt didn’t know the definition of ‘staying still’.

By the time they actually start the movie and Hunk hands out little bowls of popcorn and cans of soda, Keith has given up and accepts the unfairly comfortable and warm spot by Shiro’s side. He stays painfully still for most of the movie, as does Shiro, until the stiffness in his back becomes unbearable. He collapses back against the couch, pulling him ever closer to the others side, Matt’s nudging doesn’t help.

After a minute, Shiro slowly begins to relax, and moves to get himself comfortable by dropping his prosthetic arm on the back of the couch, directly behind Keith, who jolts at the near contact. Shiro’s arm, and his whole-body can only retreat so far, shoving himself back into his uncomfortable corner of the couch to give Keith his space back. Keith curses himself internally for being so jumpy. He didn’t mean to; he didn’t want to. He craves Shiro’s touch. Wanted to welcome that little gesture but now he already knows what Shiro is thinking.

* * *

When Keith relaxed against the couch, Shiro took that as a sign for it to be alright, so he followed suit and tried to stretch out comfortably. When he dropped his arm behind Keith’s head he honestly was just trying to stretch, he didn’t mean to freak Keith out, but he unfortunately did. Keith jumped a bit at the distance closing between them, and Shiro quickly withdrew for Keith’s sake. The last thing he wanted is to make Keith uncomfortable.

Keith was the one to move closer first, so he mistook that as an invitation to close the gap a bit further. Maybe he didn’t mistake it. Maybe Keith was alright with it, but it’s the smooth metal of Shiro’s arm that repulsed him. Keith wasn’t used to post-accident Shiro. He wasn’t accustomed to the hair or the scars or the prosthetic. Maybe he never would be. Maybe it’s all too much for Keith.

He spends the rest of the movie watching Keith. Both in longing, and in fear; he so badly wants to touch Keith. To hold him, to kiss him, to just be near him, but for Keith’s sake he kept his distance. He’s not sure how to feel about constantly catching Keith trying to observe him. Every now and then Keith would look up at him, expecting to just sneak a glance it would seem, probably to make sure they weren’t too close, but every time he’d find Shiro already looking down at him. Keith’s face would burn, and he’d quickly snap his gaze away.

The movie ends sooner than Shiro had expected, and much to his displeasure. The awkward and uncomfortable gap between them aside, this is the closest he’s gotten to Keith in years and it’s killing them.

“We need to talk,” Keith leans in to whisper in his ear before getting up as the movie credits roll. Shiro, ignoring the others knowing gaze, bolts up and follows after Keith, straight to his own office. He lets Keith in, and shuts and locks the door. He doesn’t trust the others to not have someone to interrupt or eavesdrop.

“I’m sorry for that. I just.. I wasn’t expecting you to get that close… That doesn’t mean I didn’t like it,” Keith starts, leaning back against the door, eyes bashfully glued to the door and beautiful blush burning his face. Shiro’s heart nearly pounds right out of his chest.

“It was a car accident, right?” Keith suddenly asks, raising his eyes a bit and setting his gaze clearly on Shiro’s arm.

“Five minutes out of the airport, yes,” he clarifies, swallowing the dry lump in his throat as he realizes where this conversation is heading. He had promised Keith he’d call him as soon as the plane landed but, “My phone died as soon as I left the plane. Matt’s had died hours ago, otherwise I would’ve borrowed his to contact you.” Keith nods to himself, processing the new information.

“The crash was bad. My arm got trapped underneath the other vehicle, some truck driver running on too little sleep. By the time I got to the hospital, they claimed there was no other option but to amputate it. Matt and his father weren’t able to give the o.k. to go through with the surgery so it was the doctor’s call to save my life.” He holds up his right arm to reveal the full extent of the solid metal. Keith’s eyes scan it for a second, admiring the realistic design. The arm function was far more advanced than any high brand prosthetic on the market.

“My grandfather died on impact. The Holts were both out for a few weeks with some pretty bad broken bones and head traumas. They stayed with me as much as possible while I was unconscious. I was in a coma for almost a year. They said my chances of waking up were only at fifteen percent and every doctor was shocked to see I even had brain function. They said it’s a miracle that I woke up and recovered the way I did.” He watches Keith’s jaw clench, and he swears he can see tears well up in those beautiful amethyst eyes. His arms ache to embrace him, but he doesn’t want to make this story any harder to retell.

“I had severe memory loss for a while after I woke up. I didn’t know my name, where I was…I was a mess. By the time I remembered you, you were nowhere to be found…” He remembers how startled he became when he finally remembered who Keith was. The pure panic he held, knowing that Keith was out there somewhere without him, in the dark about the accident. It tore him apart that Keith would have assumed the worst, thinking Shiro had abandoned him. When he couldn’t find a way to get a hold of Keith, it only made it worse. His nightmares consisted of the accident and Keith’s reaction, even to this day.

Keith took a shuddering breath, attempting to discreetly wipe away any tears with his sleeves. “I couldn’t handle it after you disappeared. Everyone had assumed you died… I had to assume that you died.” His voice comes out strained even as he tries his hardest to keep it relatively steady.

“For three years, I’ve lived my life assuming the worst and thinking that you were dead. I know that none of this was your fault and I need you to know that I am not mad at you... I just…” another strained breath, “ I need a little more time to get used to this. It took a while for me to get on a path where I could start to heal and suddenly knowing what I know now? It’s a lot… I just need time. I know that’s not the answer you’re looking for, but, that’s the best I can do right now.” Keith finally looks up, looking directly at Shiro through thick, damp eyelashes. The sight is nearly enough to kill him on the spot. He’s always been a sucker for Keith’s eyes, they’re much like the beautiful galaxies they used to admire together.

Keith’s words are not a statement, but an offering. A smidgen of hope for Shiro, and he clings to them like his life depends on it. Keith means everything to him, and the possibility to even spend time with him again was a blessing he had only dreamed of. 

“Take all the time you need,” Shiro agrees. He’s been given everything he needed to know. Keith doesn’t hate him. Keith isn’t mad with him. Keith isn’t disgusted by who he’s become. For Shiro, it’s been about a year and a half since he’s seen Keith, and he always knew his love was out there, somewhere. For Keith, it’s been three years, and all his evidence pointed towards Shiro being dead. It’s a lot to cope with. If Keith needs time to adjust, then he’s more than happy to give him that time. He’ll be here for Keith for as long as necessary. He’ll continue to love Keith for as long as Keith will let him.

“Thank you… I’ll see you tomorrow?” Keith’s smiles, hopeful and shy. Shiro can’t help but return the sentiment.

“I’ll be waiting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Shout out to my new amazing Beta! They added so much wonderful detail to this chapter, you also have them to thank for most of the flashbacks!   
> Let me know what you guys think!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “You must be Shiro!” His mother starts, before he can get a chance to even formulate any sort of plan for how to run damage control. She’s across the room in seconds, eagerly shaking his hand like the traitor she is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter ended up being wayyyy longer than I thought it would be. Hope you guys enjoy it!

Keith is still patting himself on the back for actually getting through his conversation with Shiro. Now, the unbearable weight on his chest has been lifted and it feels like he can truly heal now.

Even though he might have desired something different, he did what was best for him and Shiro; he couldn't live with Shiro constantly thinking that Keith hates him. Shiro deserved the truth which was that Keith just needs time to adjust. 

And Shiro seemed okay with that.

Sure enough, he was waiting for Keith in the office the very next morning with a hot coffee and a breakfast sandwich. He says nothing, just hands them over to Keith with a smile that warms Keith’s whole being.

He smiles to himself as he meanders the hallways to his next meeting with Allura. The topic of his meetings today revolved around Voltron, the potential saving grace for the company. While the pressure seemed to weigh on him more than ever, especially with the Galra’s involvement, he held his head high. He knew his designs were solid and the safety precautions put in place were guaranteed to reduce any theft.

It hadn’t been a conscious decision to model the bikes after people he knew, but after reading through the notes by Alfor, it was impossible to not make connections.

The Blue Lion is a ride meant to be smooth with an elegance a motorcycle shouldn’t be able to possess. It’s a secure vehicle, not too fast, not too big, not too light. The variety of blue’s swirling over one another on the side decal were complimenting one another rather than overpowering. Balanced. Essentially, a perfect example of Allura and Lance’s relationship.

After first meeting the two, they seemed like complete opposites, and it had Keith wondering how in the hell they managed to actually date without murdering one another. Allura is calm and collected, the pure definition of elegant and graceful. Lance, her antonym, rowdy and dramatic that doesn’t differ much than a child; chaotic and a bit annoying at times. Yet, upon further inspection, he realized how well they balanced each other out. Allura’s professional and proper attitude, believe it or not, actually tones down Lances frenzied nature. At the same time, Lance’s exuberant personality breaks up Allura’s previously strict and dull lifestyle and has taught her how to let go of some of her extra, unneeded tension.

The Blue Lion became a cruiser with a sleek and elegant frame and all the practical needs necessary for a well-balanced work loaded life, but with plenty of speed and an extra smooth ride for those fun get away road-trips. It was most likely going to be popular among the intermediate riders – familiar enough to not be considered a rookie but not enough experience to be an experienced rider. Keith swears it will be the best-selling bike for couples and families, as it’s the most sensible and comfortable for two people to ride.

Pidge and Matt became his inspiration for The Green Lion, aka ‘The Beginner’s Bike’. The Holt’s were not known for their devil ways. Keith’s never seen Matt drive anything above 70 mph, and he’s been given the ‘motorcycles are death traps’ by both of them a total of nine times now. While both siblings do have driver’s licenses, they never feel the need to actually drive due to how they already have a Station close to their apartments, and how close Shiro(who does love to drive) is to them as well. They’ve never really felt a desire to have their own vehicle. So Keith designs something that would draw the eye of even those that have never even spared a motorcycle a second glance. The machinery was top tier. It was the smallest vehicle but that didn’t restrict any of the important design choices, if anything, it was the smartest ride of them all. Multi-tiered technology installed into the GPS system let the rider easily navigate the roads and answer messages without ever needing to touch anything. The design is the lightest standard frame possible, so that it’s light enough so that anyone who lacks experience should be able to handle it with ease. They make it durable though, they don’t cheat on any of the safety. They top it off with a transparent green pain so that people could see through the cover so they could admire the beauty of the engine as they’re driving. He got the official Holt seal of approval.

Hunk’s wonderful personality brings light to The Yellow Lion. He designs a sort of adventure cruiser. It’s something sturdy, and reliable, with plenty of extra armor and space. Anyone nervous about safety or possibly crashing could remove any fears with the backup safety protocols designed into the system. Sturdier wheels and a chunkier frame meant accidents were a minimum risk. Comfort was designed into the mainframe to reduce feedback from sudden movement and was to be prepared with Olkarion for it’s helmet, a partner company specializing in safe motor gear. The yellow was modest, but practical in late night drives for higher visibility. It was the safest motorcycle to be on the market.

The Black Lion, the prized vehicle of the group, was modeled after Shiro and estimated to be the top seller among fanatics. Strong, regal, everything anyone would lust over in a leader of a pack. The sheik, black color was reinforced with Luxite, paint made to last by Daibazaal. No other company could ever compare, and this motorcycle was the epitome of a ‘classic ride’. It combined the best features of all the other motorcycles. The engine power itself was off the charts, despite how silent of a ride it is.

The last design that he works on is The Red Lion. According to Alfor Altea’s notes, the Red Lion is a machine made to be built for speed and the thrill of adventure. Despite its possibly reckless tendencies, it knows where it needs to go, the final destination always home. It’s about loyalty as much as it is freedom. His notes claim that if The Black Lion is the leader, then the Red Lion is its right hand machine; they’re a pair meant to be together.

Keith has been hesitant to select his final design for this one in particular, knowing where it’s going to take him. Naturally, if this one is Shiro’s other half, then he’s going to end up modeling it after himself. It’s what makes sense off of Alfor’s notes; This is Keith’s bike.

If he were to design this for himself over five years ago, he’d draw himself up a sports-bike. Something sharp and dangerous looking, optimal for speed. He’d design it with the thrill and excitement of riding, and that alone; safety would have been an afterthought.

But he’s not the same reckless, dare-devil kid that he used to be; he’s been shattered one too many times now. He is still a speed-demon, there’s no doubt about that, but he’s settled down now. There’s no more adventure cruises for the fuck of it: he rides with purpose now, looking for a home to return to. He may not have had a destination for many years, but his journey finally has one, and it’s all about getting there now.

The Red Lion becomes something resembling a sport-touring bike. A mix between that thrill-seeking, wild child he once was, and the jaded but sturdy adult that he’s become. Red is a perfect complimentary to The Black Lion. It’s a bit lighter and a bit faster than what he designed for Shiro, what he designed for anyone else, but just as capable of long and comfortable trips. It’s built to endure any type of road, including all off road opportunities.

All the designs are there. He’s made thousands of sketches and notes and now he’s just working with the others to bring them to life but with The Galra looming over them with their threats of buying them out, everyone is rushing the project into production, and work has been nothing less than chaotic. He’s worked more in this one day then he has since he got here.

It’s a bit passed noon, and Keith has already answered 26 emails, answered 14 calls, 31 texts, and has had seven meetings. He’s still scheduled for about four more and has a few more calls to make too. Not to mention he has to redo a couple of his notes for the tech team.

He got a call from his mother a about an hour ago asking him if he wanted to go out for lunch with her, but he warned her that he was probably too busy to actually go out. He should have known his schedule would not deter his mother, as 45 minutes later, he finds her in the office lobby with a bento box.

“There you are!” She scolds, rolling her eyes at him but he knows better than to think she’s actually upset with him. “You can’t leave to get lunch but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t eat.”

She hands over the plastic box. It’s the same one she’s been using for him since they met: black and red striped. In the short time they lived together, she used to make Keith a lunch every day, pack it up in the little bento box and send him off to work with it like he was a little kid. Sometimes it was just leftovers from dinner the night before or a mixed-up version of that mornings breakfast. Sometimes it was more of a traditional style Japanese bento lunch, or sometimes it was a simple American style ‘sack’ lunch. Whatever it was, it never failed to make him smile.

“Keith? Hunk is looking for you,” he hears behind him suddenly, and every hair on his body stands up as Shiro steps into the room. _Shit._

“You must be Shiro!” His mother starts, before he can get a chance to even formulate any sort of plan for how to run damage control. She’s across the room in seconds, eagerly shaking his hand like the traitor she is.

“Uh, yes? That’s me,” Shiro nods, looking between her and Keith, confusion sparkling in his dark eyes as he tries to figure out exactly who the woman shaking his hand is. Keith can’t blame him; he would be terrified if an eager stranger suddenly started enthusiastically greeting him.

“Um, Shiro. This is Krolia,” He takes a deep breath, briefly considering holding it to make himself pass out and get out of this situation, “my mother.” Shiro’s eyes blow wide and his jaw nearly drops to the floor.

“Your mother? Like… like your _birth_ mother?” He asks for clarification as he clutches onto Krolia’s hand. He’d be worried for Krolia’s hand if he didn’t already know she had the pain endurance of a sabretooth tiger.

“That’s me. It’s nice to finally meet you, Shiro.” She smiles at him as he now eagerly returns her handshake.

“It’s an honor to meet you, Ma’am.” And yeah, he’s definitely won Krolia over with that big goofy smile of his.

“Anyway!”

Keith clears his throat, hoping to end this awkward confrontation before it can get out of hand. This isn’t exactly how he thought he should tell Shiro that he finally found his mom, and it’s definitely not how he imagined Shiro meeting her - Not that he had imagined it at all. “I have to get back to work mom, thank you so much for lunch, I’ll see you later okay, bye, love you.” He practically shoves her out the front doors to save his dignity.

“Alright, I can take a hint. Goodbye, Shiro! Lovely to meet you! Bye, dear. Love you too.” She rolls her eyes at Keith again, a little frustrated with her adorably flustered mess of a son.

“So, uh, yeah. I found my mother.” He turns back to Shiro after she’s gone, eyes glued to the wall directly behind him, but god, he can’t ignore Shiro’s smile. It’s so bright, like the sun, and just as warm.

“I’m so glad, Keith. That’s wonderful,” he tells him. Keith hesitates for a second, unsure of what else to say.

“I am, um. I am going to go find Hunk,” Keith mutters, hurrying past Shiro to get back to work while clutching his lunch close to his chest, the image of Shiro’s smile haunting him as he goes.

* * *

Shiro watches Keith go, a bit confused but still flooded with happiness.

He remembers how it had taken a while before Keith finally snapped and told Shiro about his family. 

Shiro had managed to learn many little fascinating facts and facets of Keith’s wonderful personality, but their path of friendship was always carved out based on what Keith would give. Shiro only ever learned what Keith was comfortable with him knowing. Keith took the lead in everything unless he specifically told or asked Shiro to guide him instead; Shiro was more than ok with this.

He knew that Keith’s past wasn’t a simple subject, and it was definitely a sensitive one. In the first months of their friendship, all he knew was that Keith grew up in a small and barren desert town. Anytime someone talked about hometowns, childhoods, or any sort of family related matters, Keith would immediately shut down.

Even the smallest, vaguest mention of any of those topics and Keith would silence himself. He’d shut his mouth, drop his eyes down to the floor and begin to fidget in his spot. If he was sitting, his knee would start bouncing uncontrollably. Standing, he’d rock in place just slightly. Sometimes he’d play with his hands, his hair or his shirt hem. He couldn’t look anyone else in the eye and he’d barely respond to anything after.

‘Mother’ and ‘Father’ were solid in the ‘Do Not Talk About’ list. Keith would suddenly disappear at such a mention, his brain stewing in his past.

Shiro noticed it every single time, and it worried him like all hell. He tends to assume the worst of things, so his first thought was that Keith was currently stuck with an abusive family, or perhaps he came from a broken family. It never occurred to him that Keith had no family at all. He tried his best to avoid the topic, refused to say anything about it until it seemed like Keith was comfortable and ready.

That day came during their Christmas break. A little more specifically, the day before Christmas eve, and Shiro had dedicated that day just to Keith, knowing he’d be stuck with the Holt’s for the next two days. That day was his last chance to get a gift to Keith before Christmas.

That’s was the plan, anyway.

That changed the second he handed Keith the hazardously wrapped sketch book he had gotten for him nearly a month before. He knew Keith adored art, a way to calm him and also create something out of his frustration. Keith had a small, battered journal in which he took notes and occasionally sketched in, but Shiro wanted to give him the chance to have something that was just meant for his art. He had spent half a day in the art store trying to figure out what the difference was between ‘Mixed-Media’ and ‘Bristol’. A store attendant finally took pity on him and asked him questions about who the gift was for before handing him the present he chose:

_“What?” Keith asked, staring up at Shiro from his spot on the couch, violet eyes wide with shock and confusion. They sparkled so bright that they put the hundreds of lights that Matt had insisted on stringing up to shame._

_“It’s a Christmas present, Keith. Take it,” he insisted, watching as Keith’s hand, slow and unsteady, reached up to grip onto it. He didn’t expect Keith to have gotten him anything for he knows Keith doesn’t really have a lot of money, and he had mentioned that he had never really done anything for the Holiday. That didn’t mean he didn’t want to get Keith something though. He deserved to have something special._

_“I know what it is, I just…” Keith takes a deep, shaky breath as he pulls the present down into his lap. He stares down at it like he’s waiting for the damn thing to explode. Then Shiro notices tiny droplets of water splatting onto the atrocious red foil wrapping paper. Tears. He knew it looked awful, but he didn’t think his wrapping was tear worthy._

_“Keith!?” He gasps, quickly moving onto the couch to sit down beside his friend, unsure of what was happening or what to do, just desperate to make sure Keith was okay._

_“Sorry,” He chokes, refusing to look up at Shiro. Sniffling, Keith made a half-hearted attempt to wipe away his tears with the sleeve of his sweater._

_“I just… I haven’t gotten a present in years. A real, actual present…” Keith’s voice is so quiet and shaky, filled with disbelief. Shiro’s heart is shattered and pieced back together in seconds as Keith finally looks up at him, purple eyes still a little watery and cheeks tinted red, “Thank you, Shiro.”_

Keith had finally caved and told Shiro about his past after that. He told Shiro all he knew about the mother that had left him right after he was born. About the brave fireman that ran into the flames to save someone else’s life, consequently leaving his own son, Keith, alone.

By the age of eight, he was orphaned, and he spent the next eight years in and out of foster homes. Apparently, Little Keith was a bit of a troublemaker, or so said the foster system. Shiro doesn’t consider running away from abusive foster families or fighting back against bullies in self-defense as being a ‘nuisance’.

None of his foster-families ever actually gave him gifts at Christmas. He said it was either they didn’t think he deserved to be rewarded, or they’d give him something cheap and mundane like a single pair of dollar-store socks or a new toothbrush.

Shiro was the first person to give Keith an actual present since his dad died.

That night was also the first time he and Keith had ever hugged. Before that, Keith kept physical contact to brief, passing touches. A hand on the shoulder was the extent of physical affection, but when Keith tore off the wrapping paper, he looked at the gift for maybe a second before launching himself into Shiro’s arms. It seemed like that was the last brick in the comfort wall too, because things began to progress much quicker after Christmas.

Shiro offered if Keith wanted to join in on the Holt’s holiday parties. Keith had refused, because he didn’t want to feel like a pity invite, and he didn’t know the Holts all that well.

So instead of accepting that and leaving Keith alone for the Holidays, Shiro canceled with Matt’s family and stayed home for the next two days and had Keith spend the night Christmas eve and Christmas day. Keith showed up with plenty of snacks and spare clothes and a tiny gift bag for Shiro that held a little key-chain charm in the shape of a star.

They spent the next two days curled up on the couch eating a ridiculous amount of junk food with heavily rum based eggnog and watching every single holiday movie they could find and sharing any family stories they could remember.

It’s rather cheesy, but Shiro’s pretty sure Keith might have given him his heart that Christmas.

Shiro gets caught up in his thoughts, his memories, and how happy he is for Keith that he has finally found his family that for a second he nearly forgets that he has work of his own to do.

He’s about to turn back into the office when he hears someone call his name.

“Shirogane!” It’s a fairly unfamiliar voice but he recognizes it right away because he just heard it a couple minutes ago. Keith’s mom stands in the doorway of the office, a smirk on her face as she approaches him. Now that the initial confusion and shock has past, he realized how much Keith looks like his mother. He’s seen old photos of Heath Kogane, Keith’s father, and always figured he got most of his looks from him. The square shoulders, the thick hair and eyebrows, the signature frown.

But his mother? She has the same slender and elegantly strong frame, the same defined sharp features. Keith clearly gets his velvet black hair and the violet eyes from her except some her features are rounder, softer than Keith’s rugged look. Her hair is much thinner, and shorter than Keith’s. She’s an inch or so taller than her son, and he knows Heath was about 6’4” which makes him wonder how in the hell Keith ended up being so small.

More importantly, she’s got that same wicked _‘I am about to fuck shit up, get in my way and I’ll make you regret it’_ smile that Shiro has seen on her son one too many times.

“Mrs. Kogane? Did you - did you need me to get Keith for you?”

He’s so nervous he can’t help stuttering the sentence out. The woman may be two and a half inches shorter then him but he’s learned the hard way several times over that you never under estimate a Kogane. Besides, the only thing more terrifying then meeting your partners parents for the first time, is meeting the parent of the love of your life that you unintentionally abandoned and left heart-broken. A shiver of fear ran down Shiro’s spine.

“No, I was actually waiting for him to leave. Have you had lunch today, Shirogane?” She asks, and he feels his stomach rumble quietly in response.

“No, Ma’am,” he shakes his head. He doesn’t move; doesn’t look her directly in the eye. He’s a trapped mouse, waiting for the snake to snap and kill him any moment now, but she doesn’t. She just eyes him, carefully, taking him in a bit at a time. He can only imagine what she’s working out in her head, most likely trying to determine if Shiro is worth her son’s trouble.

“Would you like to have lunch with me?” She asks suddenly, and Shiro nearly gets whiplash from how fast the tone of the room has changed.

“Sure,” he answers quickly because he’s a bit afraid of what would happen if he were to decline. She gives him a wide smile and gestures for the front doors.

“Let’s go then. Do you mind going to the little Café down the road? I’ve been there a few times with Keith and I love their tea.” She offers, and when Shiro shakes his head, she begins walking. He follows after her like a confused puppy.

“Um… Mrs. Kogane?” He clears his throat once they are outside, and she takes a second to spare him a glance over her shoulder, pressing the walk light button. “Can I ask why you want to go to lunch with me?” He’s terrified of the answer. He’s pretty sure she might actually be leading him to his death for hurting her kid. Or maybe he’s about to get the shovel talk of a lifetime. Either way sounds like it might end in Shiro having a premature heart attack.

“Well, I was expecting to take my son to lunch, but since he’s unavailable, I figure you’re the next best thing.” It doesn’t really answer any of his questions and in fact, it gives him more, yet he doesn’t dare further his question.

They walk in silence until they get to the café. She insists on paying for Shiro’s coffee and lunch with a silent steel gaze that tells him he’s powerless to fight her. He never could fight Keith’s adorably intimidating stare, much less the woman who he learned it from.

Keith was always a ‘Beat around the bush till the bush gets trampled on’ sort of person. He wouldn’t say what he wanted or needed to until he really couldn’t hold it in anymore. He apparently did not inherit that from his mother.

“I’ll be honest with you, Shirogane,” she murmurs the second they sit down in a small secluded booth, far away from the rest of the lunch rush. “I knew my son was going to be busy for lunch; I actually wanted to meet you. I knew it’d be ages before he told you about me let alone introduce us.”

She huffs, taking a sip of her tea. Her expression is a mirror image of Keith’s pout, a cute sort of smirk that he used when he didn’t get something he wanted. Shiro’s a little taken back by the honesty, but he knows she’s right. How long would Keith have waited to tell him?

“I just wanted to meet the man who at one point was probably going to become my son-in-law, and from the stories I’ve been told, still might be.” Shiro nearly chokes on his coffee as he tries to process her words. _Son-in-law._ He spends the next few minutes trying to avoid his brain from elaborating on the idea.

“O-oh,” he stutters out, his mind reeling, rushing to try to catch back up to the present.

“I know my son’s side of the story. But now, I want to know _yours._ ” A mix of dread and sorrow builds up in his throat in the form of a painfully dry lump. He does his best to swallow it down and maintain his composure.

“I got in a car crash right outside of the airport, I was in a coma,” he starts, but she quickly cuts him off with a wave of her hand and a tiny sigh.

“I know about that. I figured it wasn’t your choice in the first place, and it doesn’t take a genius to realize you’ve gone through some trauma. Besides, Keith told me all about it last night.” Shiro’s heart plummets. If she already knows, why is she asking?

“That’s not what I wanted to know,” she keeps going after a second to enjoy her drink, “I want to know why you’re holding back now. After you’ve finally been reunited after all these years, you’ve chosen to hesitate. I want to know why the hell you’re not doing everything you can to sweep my son off his feet. What are you so scared of, Shiro?” Her words feel like thorns to his heart: precise and painful. The conversation was beginning to feel more like an interrogation rather than a ‘casual’ conversation.

“See,” she begins somberly, “when I was free for the first time, there was nothing I wanted more than to be with my family. I wasn’t going to let anyone, or anything stop me from getting back to them. To say I’d changed would have been understatement. Mentally and physically, I was a mess. I was skin and bones, my hair was thin and frail and falling out from stress and malnourishment. I was covered in a variety of scars.” She reaches up and taps the two pale lines on either cheek. “I looked like a trampled scarecrow and honestly, I felt like one too. I barely felt human at many points and every time I looked at myself in the mirror, I would ask myself if my family would want me after what I’d gone through. I think you’re worried about the exact same thing. I think you’re too scared of the possibility that Keith will realize that you’re not the same man he fell in love with, and that’s why you’re just waiting instead of acting.”

Shiro’s frozen to his seat, trapped there by Krolia’s cold, knowing gaze. He swore his heart skipped a few beats in terror. She sees right through him as easy as if he were made of glass and she’s not afraid to throw the jagged rock at him to shatter him. She looks him over once, noticing the increased tension in his posture.

“Let me tell you something, Shiro. No one will stay the same forever. That’s how life works. And that’s also the gamble people play with love. You grow together and you pray that you end up loving whoever they become. You’ve changed a lot more than the average person has had to, sure, but so has Keith. At his core, however, he’s still the Keith you met all those years ago. And there’s no doubt you’re still his Shiro. I don’t think there’s a force in this universe that could ever make him feel anything but love for you.” She takes a deep breath and pushes herself up from her seat.

He was expecting the shovel talk, not an in-depth emotional interrogation in which his soul was bared to a stranger. The accident may have caused a great deal of terror and nightmares within him, but this lunch was proving to be a close second.

“I know you think you’re doing yourselves both a favor by waiting for him to be ready, but Shiro, my son has been looking for you for three years; I think he’s done enough waiting already.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you guys think! Comments are always greatly appreciated! They make my day! I totally love hearing from you guys!   
> Shout out to my awesome Beta @cuddlewuddlepug for helping me out!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You always were a knight in shining armor"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this ones a bit later than usual, I've had a hella busy week. Hope you guys enjoy it!

The next few days go by in a blur. Everyone is putting their all into the Voltron Project working from early hours in the morning till late in the afternoon. Any social lives the employees held had crumbled for breakfast, lunch, and dinner were all spent in a rush at the office. Keith’s pretty sure there’s a floor hiding underneath the piles of sheets and blueprints scattered across his office, but it’s been too long since he’s last glimpsed it.

Keith has had meeting after meeting redesigning and helping the others bring his designs to life. There has even been some testing and beta projects roaming around. 

The only stable routine he finds for himself between the recent hectic nature of the office is Shiro. Shiro has made sure to hand him a coffee and some sort of breakfast with his signature soft smile to brighten up Keith’s day. He salutes him and waves him off with something along the lines of ‘to get you through the day; good luck’ before disappearing into a meeting.

Meetings and small talk have reduced drastically in terms of awkwardness between them. They’re able to greet and bid another farewell for the day without any strained tension. In the past few days, Keith has even been eating lunch with Shiro.

Neither of them have had the time to go out and eat at Sal’s like the others, so Matt, upon returning from his lunch break, would bring them back something. They'd take a quick few minutes to scarf down their food together in the breakroom, usually in silence, before rushing back to work.

Today, though, is different. The night before, he was haunted by nightmares.

Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Shiro pulling away from him all over again.

It's the sort of thing Keith has dreaded and feared since finding out Shiro was alive. He’s terrified that the second he lets him back into his heart, he'll disappear. Keith’s lived through that once and he doubts he could survive it again.

When he stumbles into work that morning, he's half awake, running on a combined total of an hour and a half of sleep and the energy boost from a red bull he found in the back of his fridge. Shiro is waiting for him in the break room, as he has been every morning, with his coffee and his breakfast. 

"Allura told me this morning is going to be a bit hectic, so I thought you might need a little something extra to get you through the day." He hands Keith not one, but two thermoses.

"The second one is that spicy chai latte you like.” He holds out a paper bag with a smiley face drawn on the side that Keith instantly mirrors upon seeing it. “And this is your usual breakfast sandwich and some hash browns." The smell of deliciously greasy, slightly burnt potatoes wafts into his face. Keith lets out a loud, pleased groan as Shiro hands over the paper bag.

"What would I do without you," The expression rolling off his tongue with ease. Brain so caught up in his hunger induced gratitude that he doesn’t realize what he’s saying until by the last word has tumbled out of his mouth. He and Shiro are stare at each other with wide and alarmed eyes. The hidden meaning hits them both hard and fast and the little frown that Shiro’s lips form practically obliterate him.

"Keith... I-" he begins, a look of resignation crossing his face. Keith doesn’t know what he's going to say and he’s afraid to find out. He’s not ready for that conversation yet.

"Shiro, stop. I didn’t mean it like that; it’s just an expression. Thank you for breakfast, though, I really needed this today."

Shiro’s smile returns and Keith curses internally because it's fucking blinding and it's way too early for his heart to be acting like this. "My pleasure then. Good luck today."

Shiro pats his shoulder on his way out of the room. Keith feels a flash of heat bloom across his whole upper body in response.

The last meeting before lunch was scheduled to be for Shiro, Keith, Lance, and Allura to work out when, where and how they should begin announcing their project. Keith is trying to convince them to hold off on any and all announcements until everything is complete, but they're not buying it. 

"If you make news about the prototypes, you’re practically handing the Galra the blueprints. They have thousands of workers who can put out a replica in less time than it takes us to have this meeting. They get word about Voltron? They’ll have their own ‘new product’ before we can even schedule a launch date. They’ve done it before to larger companies without even batting an eye." He keeps trying. Keeps trying to convince them and make them understand that The Galra are ruthless and that they should understand that. Allura’s father nearly lost this entire company because of them, yet they refuse to listen to Keith. 

"No,” Allura sighs, “I’m sorry, but this is how we always have done it. We'll be releasing an interview about the prototypes." She argues, tired of the repetitive argument. They've gone through this loop about six times now and Keith is getting _really_ tired of it. He keeps handing her all the facts but she refuses to see it. He’s given her scenario after scenario and she won’t accept them. They just keep talking circles around him, talking over him, cutting him off, and just not listening to him. Allura and Lance are so stuck in ‘tradition’ that they refuse to even acknowledge that Alfors original system had already fucked them over once and will absolutley fuck them over again.

"It's a risk you can't afford to take!" He slams his hand down on the table, shaking slightly with fury. If they won’t listen to Keith’s kinder, detailed examples then he’s just going to have to be as blunt as possible. Maybe they’ll listen once he slaps them in the face with it. "The Galra will just copy it; I know how they work! They'll push their own copy of the product and completely shadow our own. We wouldn’t survive the match up. We need to launch all at once or this company dies!" 

Lance abruptly rises, leaning in his direction to stand over him, and puffs out his chest a bit. He’s not terrifying to any sense of the word, but he does use the slight height advantage to impose an aura of authority. Well, he tries. Not that it actually works on Keith in anyway but to induce more anger.

“You don't actually get a say in when we launch, Keith. You made some nice little doodles on a page for us and that's it. That doesn’t mean you get to make any of the big decisions."

"This is _my_ fucking project, McClain. You wouldn’t be launching shit without me. I’m telling you that I know how the Galra operate and if you announce the prototype, we're fucking screwed!" 

Lance coughs out a pitiful laugh, the sort Keith has heard from all sorts of authority figures throughout his life. "You were a lap dog for a Galra executive. You were just eye-candy that sat on their desks and wiggled your hips in hopes of being noticed. You've got no real experience. You've got nothing but half assed hot shot ideas. _You're_ what’s going screw us over. We're following company protocol for the launch of Voltron."

Keith reels back from him.

Suddenly, he’s trapped in a memory loop of his childhood, belittled and forgotten for years on end. Flashes of angry, furrowed eyebrows frowning down upon him to a complete avoidance of him, haunt him. He was used to being underestimated and treated like shit; he knew how the world saw him. He stopped being phased by it years ago. But he never thought he’d have to endure that here.

"Sit down, Lance. You're way out of fucking line." Shiro’s voice cut through the tension building in the conference room. Shiro, as Keith remembered, never put up with the world’s attitude for a second. He never let anyone get away with scorning Keith and made it a point to stand up for him.

When Keith got skipped over, Shiro chose him first. When he was looked past, Shiro only had eyes for him. When he was put down, Shiro would place him on a pedestal. If he was talked over, Shiro would get him a fucking microphone. He never once allowed anyone to treat Keith that way, even to this day, apparently.

Shiro stood up. Unlike Lance, He doesn’t need to do much at all to come off as intimidating as it's his natural aura for most people. Only a handful like Keith and Matt know about Shiro’s incredibly soft tendencies.

Shiro towers over half the population, standing at 6’3” with a body that could bench press most people with ease. Keith has never had the frightening aspect of Shiro directed at him, always familiar only with the dorky conversations and the soft cuddles and mother hen attitude. His stern expression and the tight frown and the slightly threatening body language has always been reserved just for people that upset Keith.

"Shiro, it's alright," he murmurs, attempting to calm him down after a moment of awkward silence. Things have escalated quicker than need be and he's got to stop it before it gets worse. They don’t need anyone injured today.

"No, babe, it's not alright. An argument can have opposing sides, but there's no need to disrespect anyone, much less you." Shiro turns to him, and when his gaze lands on Keith, his face is so much warmer than the freezing cold glare that he had been giving Lance half a second ago. The way he gazes at Keith is fierce but loving and protective.

He doesn’t seem aware of the emotional bomb he's just casually dropped. The affectionate term that, once upon a time, was synonymous with Keith’s name, feels similar to a shock of cold water being thrown upon him. It's a shame Shiro doesn’t seem to notice it, because that word makes Keith's knees feel weak with an overwhelming desire to yank Shiro down by his tie and kiss him until they are both out of breath.

"I’m sorry, Shiro. You’re right. I was out of line." Lance is quick to apologize. Partially being genuinely sincere and partially because he's terrified of this side of Shiro that they've never seen before. 

"Look, I get it. We've always done our launches the same way and this is a high stakes situation, but Keith is right. Our best chance is to launch it all at once. Surprise our enemy.”

At the end of the meeting Allura apologizes again but this time she agrees on Keith’s plan. Lance pulls Keith aside afterward.

“Hey, Man…” He starts off with a sigh, leaning against the wall, struggling to look Keith in the eye. “Look, I am really sorry about the shit that I said in there. I am not trying to make excuses for my shitty behavior or anything but it’s just… It’s been a long week; we are all tired and stressed out. And I get really protective of Allura. I know she’s usually too nice when people snap at her. So, when you started to raise your voice, I went on the defense without thinking about it. Like Shiro does for you…I didn’t mean that stuff. I know you’ve got a lot of experience and everything you’ve been doing for us is great. You didn’t deserve that right now.” Lances apology this time actually blows Keith away. He means it. It’s completley genuine and sincere this time. Not induced from fear of Shiro.

It’s the first time Lance has just… talked to him. Every time they talk one on one it’s usually just them bickering or Lance trying to squeeze ‘gossip’ out of him or something. But this is an actual dialogue between them. It’s also probably the first time he’s talked to Lance for longer than a minute without being tempted to punch him.

“Thanks…” Is the only thing Keith can manage to say, and when a bit of disappoint glimpses in Lances eyes, Keith sticks out his hand as a gesture to make up for his lack of words. Lance’s lips break out into a grin and he takes Keiths hand and they have a little truth shake.

“By the way, I am glad you and Shiro are doing good.” He adds as they pull apart, his smile morphing into a smirk as he pulls his phone from his pocket and begins to type as he steps away.

“We’re not!” Keith correct, though it’s pointless.

 _“Yet.”_ Keith’s own phone buzzes with a notification as Lance disappears down the hall, no doubt from the work group chat.

"Hey, thank you," Keith tells Shiro, once they're finally alone in the breakroom. They have two to-go boxes filled to the brim with double bacon cheeseburgers and fries, courtesy of Matt.

"Shouldn't I be thanking you? You're the one who paid for lunch." Keith insists on taking care of lunch since Shiro has taken to breakfast delivery.

"I meant for backing me up in the meeting."

Shiro pauses for a second to shrug. "You were right, and they were out of line."

He says it so simply, but his actions had filled Keith’s heart with something he had long forgotten, his sense of trust and devotion slowly coming back.

"You always were a knight in shining armor. I'll see you later, yeah?" He gets up and tosses his empty bin into the trash. Shiro does the same, but there’s a hint of a blush on his cheeks.

"Yeah, we've got another meeting together at four," he confirms. 

"Great. I'll see you in your office then." Keith hesitates at the door for a second, then he decides to launch himself upward to give Shiro a very fast, very light kiss on the cheek before dashing out of the room. 

By the time he has his meeting with Shiro, he's barely awake. He's been running around non-stop from meeting to meeting and Shiro’s coffee can only take him so far. It’s affects started wearing off a bit after lunch and he can only run on fumes for so long.

He's exhausted to the point that he can barely stand so when he gets into Shiro’s office, so, he collapses onto the very comfortable leather love seat that Shiro keeps tucked in the corner. 

Shiro chuckles a bit at Keith’s dramatic display but says nothing. Keith goes over all his current work with him while Shiro gives him notes back. They don’t mention the events that transpired earlier in the day.

Not about Shiro’s protective nature, not about the term of endearment that Shiro let slip in front of their boss and coworker (who has informed the rest of the office about the slip-up via excited texts), and they don't talk about Keith’s kiss. 

They focus their leftover energy on the Voltron project.

Keith honestly doesn’t pay attention. He's too busy admiring how good Shiro looks in his business casual attire. The deep gray button-down shirt really brings out his silver eyes, showing off how wide and broad his shoulders are. The sleeves have been rolled up to his elbows allowing a decent view of his toned arms and the sleek black tie draws his attention to Shiro’s well-toned chest.

Shiro is somehow more muscular and fit now then he was when they were together, which he didn’t think was possible, and Keith is dying to see all that new muscle mass put to use.

He always liked how strong Shiro was; loved that he could easily be picked up or pinned down by him. Knowing that Shiro had the power to easily hurt him but would never dare really did it for him.

He admires the sleek metal prosthetic, too. Wonders how it will feel under his fingers, against his skin, around his cock, or spreading him open. Is it cold, like still metal? Or does all the advanced internal mechanics produce warmth? Does Shiro have to sleep with it on? Is it waterproof? There’s so much about the new Shiro that he wants to know.

Shiro brings his attention back to present time by pointing out a small detail in one of the motorcycle’s files before leaving Keith back in his own little world to focus solely on Shiro’s voice.

Fuck, his voice is beautiful.

It’s deep and smooth and always makes Keith feel similar to being cocooned in a nest of thick blankets and plump pillows. Everything about Shiro makes him feel safe and warm. Shiro lures him into a sense of comfort and security as all his worries and concerns drift away, so much so that Keith ends up drifting off.

He doesn’t know exactly when he falls asleep, but when he wakes up its 5:22 in the afternoon; well after their meeting was scheduled to end.

He's surrounded by something warm and heavy, smelling of black coffee, sage, and cloves. _Shiro._ Or well, Shiro's wool coat. It’s draped over him like a blanket and hot affection pools into his chest. 

He finds two things in the pockets: A key, and two sticky notes.

The first one reads: **_"I know better than to wake you when you’re sleeping. I locked the door so that no one could disturb you or take pictures. Please relock the door when you leave."_**

The second one seemed to be a rushed after thought, and the writing isn’t Shiro’s usual style of neat:

“ ** _You looked cold, so I thought I'd keep you warm."_**

Which is complete and utter bullshit; they both know that Keith runs warm. Shiro used to call him his portable space heater, but they both also know that Keith loves to wear Shiro’s clothes. Shiro himself loves seeing Keith wearing his things even more than Keith likes wearing them. 

Giving Keith a shirt to borrow or his jacket on any given day that was even slightly cold outside was Shiro’s 'subtle' way of putting a possessive claim on Keith. The idea makes Keith feel warmer than the Jacket does.

* * *

That night, When Shiro finally returns from his last meeting at 7pm, he finds his jacket neatly folded on his office desk with a note placed on top. It nearly killed him as he read it:

**_“Next time you think I look cold, warm me up yourself.”_ **

He takes his jacket (that now has the faint scent of Cinnamon on it from Keith) and the note and sprints to Matt’s office.

Matt’s his best and longest friend.

They’ve been glued together ever since their freshman year of high school when they were paired for a science project and managed to cause an explosion that rendered their classroom hazardous for several days.

Their probability to survive school would have tanked without one another: Matt kept Shiro on top of his studies, and Shiro made sure Matt wasn’t picked on. They kept eachother from getting lonely.

After High School, they made the choice to aim for the same college. The local university was one that both of Matt’s parents taught at. Staying close to home gave them the opprotunity to be roommates.

Matt went into the computer engineering program, and Shiro entered into mechanical engineering. So, they spent a solid amount (according to Matt, around 86.23 %) of their time together. It’s a miracle that they didn’t kill each other.

Matt has been listening to Shiro rant about his love-life for a little more than ten years.

He’s had to endure all the drama from Shiro’s high school boyfriend, Adam, who left Shiro when he refused to go to the same college as him. The breakup consisted of a tub of cookie dough ice cream and pillow forts to mourn the three-year relationship. Matt stayed with him the entire time and talked him through it and got him back out there.

Every half assed attempt of a date or hook up that Shiro ever experienced has also been ingrained in Matt’s brain. Including Shiro’s extremely pathetic and tiring month-long relationship with Curtis.

Which was the last official relationship he had before Keith came along. Matt heard about Keith every single day for weeks. At that time, Keith was just ‘the really pretty guy in Shiro’s astronomy class that may or may not have a mullet’. Matt eventually got so tired of hearing Shiro gush about his crush, and knowing that Shiro would probably never talk to him on his own accord, he set a plan into motion.

Apparently, Matt’s friends had told him about some guy with a mullet that they thought was going to be a huge asshole but would look out for people at parties and make sure no creep took them advantage of them. Matt new instantly that that guy had to be Keith. So, Matt managed to convince some girls from Keith’s class to bring him to a party where Matt could persuade Shiro to finally introduce himself.

Shiro had watched Keith sulk in the corner of the living room for a good while before he gave up on his phone and decided to go out to the porch. Matt practically shoved Shiro out the patio door to follow after him, which is something for which Shiro is eternally grateful for.

Every bit of progress between the two of them from then on had been relayed to Matt. Shiro waxing poetry about the color of Keith’s eyes was a regular event in their apartment and once Keith and Shiro’s relationship finally grew past being friends, Matt heard way more details then he would like to have. 

Shiro almost feels a little bad for Matt for all the things he’s had to endure over the years. But then again, Shiro’s also had to hear about all of Matts attempts at romance, which Shiro’s been sworn to contract to not to refer to as ‘a bit pathetic’. Plus, he endured Matt talking about his fan theories for the Star Trek universe that ended up lasting for five hours. Five. Hours. And that has happened more than once. So Shiro considers them even.

Which means Shiro doesn’t even feel the slightest bit guilty when he slams Matt’s office door that afternoon. He’s already had to pay for repair damages when Keith first came to the office and Shiro began to panic. He blames it entirely on forgetting the strength that’s held in his prosthetic, dismissing it as he’ll gladly pay for any more damage if it means he’ll get an answer to the underlying meaning of a sticky note as soon as possible.

“What does this mean?” He asks, tossing the sticky-note that Keith left him into Matt’s lap. Shiro knows he’s been working with Pidge on background checks and security detail for the past few days, but he seemed to be working on some other aspect of the technology. His computer was filled to the brim with half put together code, that was far beyond Shiro’s own understanding.

Upon hearing Shiro enter, Matt seems undisturbed other than muttering a quick comment among the lines of making Shiro pay double the amount if he breaks the door again. His office is a mess of electronics, hard drives scattered across the floor along with empty coffee cups Shiro hoped weren’t all expresso but knows better. Matt doesn’t even look at him before shrugging while typing.

“Probably that he wants to bone you?” He guesses as Shiro presses his back flat against his door.

“You didn’t even look at it, Matt.” With a dramatic sigh and an exaggerated rolling of the eyes, Matt picks up the stray note and skims it.

“Yeah, my prior statement about boning still stands, you oblivious idiot.” Matt sighs, shrugging again and returning to his work.

“Okay, first of all, please stop saying ‘bone’. Second of all, are you absolutely sure?” He moves to sit in the chair on the other side of Matt’s desk, shoving some papers aside to make room.

“Yeah dude. Didn’t he also give you a kiss on the cheek earlier?”

“Yes.”

His face feels hot just thinking about it. He wasn’t expecting that kiss at all. He swears his heart jumped right out his chest in that moment.

“And didn’t he get all flustered in your meeting earlier when you accidentally called him ‘babe’?” God, his face must be on fire. He didn’t mean for the endearment to slip out and he was hoping Keith just happened to not notice.

“According to Lance, yes.”

“and weren’t you guys like passionately in love and gonna get married three years ago before you were torn apart by unforeseen circumstances that neither of you had control over.”

“Well I never got to propose to him...” Shiro sighs as he remembers the little box tucked away, neglected, in the back of his dresser. “but stars, I hope so.” He hopes Keith was as in love as Shiro was with him.

They never explicitly said it but Shiro always figured that when Keith teasingly told Shiro ‘As many times as it takes’(every time he kicked Shiro’s ass in a video game, or takes care of a hung over Shiro for the third Sunday in a row or saves his ass when he forgets all about a class project or talks Shiro through his nerves before a big presentation, and Shiro would ask ‘How many more times are you gonna do this for me?’, always expecting Keith to get tired of it eventually) as their own sort of ‘I love You’. 

“Yeah, I think it’s safe to say he wants to bone you.” Matt concludes and Shiro winces. No matter how Matt puts it, he’s having a hard time believing it.

“What if-” He begins, his heart already dreading every possible scenario for future disappointment.

“No, absolutely not. No more ‘what ifs.’ Make a move or talk to him or literally do anything, dude. Don’t sit around in my office theorizing, go fucking find out.” Matt snaps, looking at Shiro with an exasperated expression. He knows them both too well to think it’ll go wrong. He used to watch Keith follow Shiro around like he was some sort of stray-kitten that had finally found it’s home. In a way, he supposes that’s exactly what he was. Likewise, Shiro followed Keith like a love-struck puppy. If Keith looked at Shiro like he placed every star in the sky himself, then Shiro thought it was Keith who had hung and hand carved out the moon. They were two love-blind idiots then, and they’re clearly both love-blind idiots now.

“Right, you’re right, Matt. Next time we’re alone, I’ll say something…Thanks buddy.” He sighs, pushing out of the chair. He trusts Matt’s judgement. He knows Matt wants only the best for them. If Matt thinks it’s worth it to just go for it, then he’s probably right.

“You’re welcome; now please get out of my office before Pidge kills me for not finishing this on time."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Progress!  
> Also, please note that I love Lance. Mostly I love the way he learns to grow and mature slowly throughout the show. I don't make him a dick in this chapter cause I hate him or anything.   
> However, after Shiro and Keith, Matt is still my favorite and you can pull him from my dead gay hands.   
> A big thanks to my awesome beta @cuddlewuddlepug!   
> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, let me know your thoughts!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe desperate times call for desperate measures

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sup'. February totally kicked my ass and My brain still hasnt even registered that it's March.   
> Be sure to check out them end notes!

Keith got his work permit when he was 16 so that he could have his own money and rely less on the fucking orphanage he was stuck in. It also was a good excuse to get out of that house. He worked in a very small, very shitty diner as a busboy every other day of the week and every weekend.

Eventually he made his way up the ladder to a waiter and his tips made up for the shitty environment sometimes. He worked there, 20 hours a week until the day he left for college.

Once Keith settled into Garrison University, he got a job at a little restaurant just off of campus.

There they were a lot kinder about working with his schedule. He started with about 15 to 20 hours a week, but he soon proved his worth and started getting about 30 hours a week, or sometimes more. The tips were so much better too.

Keith eventually even got regulars who’d specifically request to sit in his area and they’d usually give him a pretty nice tip. He even had a couple regulars who would bring him food for his breaks. Granted two of those regulars were Shiro and Matt, and even Matt’s parents on occasion, but you know what, it still counted.

Shiro and Matt loved visiting Keith at work. They’d sit there in a little corner window booth and eat nothing but French fries and milkshakes while making faces at Keith from across the restaurant. They’d also tip him in strange notes written on napkins and pennies and sometimes snacks. The manager and owners really didn’t mind either. In fact, they liked the boys.

One-time Keith took an extra Friday night shift to cover for someone else, effectively making him miss a party that their group had really been looking forward to. Instead of going without him, Shiro and Matt camped out at their table and very slowly got drunk off of sugary margaritas for the entirety of Keith’s 8-hour night shift.

It was a really great place to work, great boss, okay customers, decent food and a lot of fun memories. 

But once Keith ran away from school, he ran away from his whole life. He couldn’t handle anything that reminded him of Shiro. So, He quit his job, quit school, and never looked back.

He's kept busy. He needed to keep busy for his own sanity, too long alone with nothing to do always led into him thinking about what he’d lost and that wasn’t a route he was safe to go down at that point in his life. The jobs didn’t always last the longest, he's found all his disciplinary issues had come back full force without Shiro so he usually ended up saying something 'dumb' or 'rude' or 'too honest for the customers'. But he never went too long unemployed.

He had a couple weeks when he was both jobless, and technically homeless, but that's when he met the Blade of Marmora.

If he wasn’t productive, he would spend his time getting so wasted that even if he was capable of thinking, he wouldn’t remember what the hell he thought about the next morning anyway.

He was always busy, has been since he was little. But never in his life has he been _this_ busy.

For the last week (Maybe? His sense of time has blurred) he has spent every day at Altea motors. He arrives at 6 in the morning and he usually does not leave the front doors until long after the sun has gone down.

Allura isn’t forcing them to do this. It’s not the same as when his old manager at the diner would give him an eight-hour shift without a break while making him single handedly serve half the room during lunch rush.

Everyone stays by their own accord; they chose these hectic hours. Besides, Allura pays them well for the overtime and Keith's second check after starting with Altea Motors had more numbers on it then anything he'd ever had in his bank account.

So, as tired as he is, and as much as his free time has dwindled, he's not going to complain. 

What’s actually slowly draining Keith is the fact that he hasn’t had a single chance to be alone with Shiro since the day of the jacket incident. Shiro still greets him every morning with breakfast, but there’s never much talking. It’s like a hand off in a relay race. They have plenty of meetings together but always with someone else tossed in it.

He and Shiro always gravitate towards each other regardless. There's also a lot of fleeting touches. They range from high fives to shoulder pats to a hand on Keith’s back that dips a little lower than it probably should. Each touch sets Keith on fire. _Oh_ and every time Shiro leans over to whisper to him and Keith can feel the heat of his breath tingling against his neck.

God, He swears Shiro is trying to kill him. 

Any and all awkwardness between them has dissolved and they're left with that same comfortable relationship they had before. Minus the mind-blowing sex and the swoon worthy romance. Much to Keith’s disappointment. 

It was bearable at first, but he swears if this professional standoff goes on for much longer, he's gonna snap. He's stressed from work and exhausted and the sexual frustration keeps building inside him every time Shiro so much as fucking looks at him now.

He wants more. He needs more, and Keith isn’t really known for his patience. He's reaching his breaking point.

The only thing holding him back at this point is the fear that Shiro will leave him all over again. That Shiro doesn't actually want him back. Logically he’s pretty sure Shiro does want him. But his heart never responded well to logic.

He's incapable of making the first move this time. If Shiro wants him back then he is going to have to take him. 

He's dropped a few hints here and there, trying to get the message to Shiro that he's ready to move on, but Shiro, the lovable but incredibly dense idiot that he is, never picks up on it.

Pidge had waltzed in to his office at some point during the day, Keith too lost in his own notes to acknowledge the times. He had already seen her in the group meetings earlier that day but hadn’t even been able to say more than a few words to her. While Keith has known Matt the longest, Pidge was someone he felt instantly attached to. They moved in a synchronization that few had, they worked surprisingly well together, capable of spending hours in eachothers presence in complete silence as they work side by side.

Pidge has also made it abundantly clear that Shiro is like another brother to her, and want’s only the best for him, which is why she’s constantly hounding Keith about their relationship. 

“So, which one of you is going to give in first?”

“Excuse me?”

“Which one of you is going to break this stupid stand-off you have going on. I’m tired of watching you pine like idiots.” She reiterates, crossing her arms and leaning back in her seat.

She might be a few years than the rest of the group, but she sure acted much older. The tone she took on mimicked Krolia’s dubious voice and the resemblance was frightening.

“I don’t know. I’ve tried to hint that I’ve been ready, but I don’t know if it’s getting through.” He gives in, knowing he can’t hide things from her forever. She flicks a paper ball at him and he swats it back.

“I know Shiro as well as my own brother and, while I adore him, he can be as dumb as a bag of bricks when it comes to feelings. Equations of engineering and the mathematical answer to how to create the fastest motor? No problem. Realizing when someone is flirting with him ? His brain function goes out the window. You know what his past relationships were like, but you don’t even want to know the things he said at home. Especially when it came to you, god we couldn’t get him to shut up!”

“Did he really talk about me that much ?”

The glare he receives is enough to silence him. Her ‘Are you fucking kidding me?’ look is swift stab to his dignity.

“Listen, I wouldn’t normally try to interfere with your shit, but I got the office bet riding on this and I have no intention of losing. You need to make a move before this project officially releases, and that’s coming up fast. I was banking on your sporadic nature to speed things up but you’re proving me wrong right now. Lance and Matt will win if you don’t get your shit together, so I’m telling you now: You have to be explicitly clear that you’re ready for Shiro to understand.”

“What office bet ?”

“That’s irrelevant. What matters is that you two fuck it out soon or else we’ll have to endure gloating for months. Months, Keith. Think of the children, Keith.”

“What children?”

“Me. I’m the child. ” Keith holds her stern gaze for a moment before they both let out a laugh. Pidge uses her age and size to her advantage. If anyone else were to make that joke, she’d probably kick the shit out of them.

“I’m serious, though. You didn’t know me back then but I knew about you. I saw how happy Shiro was when he was with you. From what Matt’s told me, you were no different.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I might have a few rough plans...” He gives into her. He knows she’s right. They are both happiest when they’re together. He shouldn’t deny them that happiness. He’s got a few ideas of what to do but he’s still so unsure of everything.

“That’s what I like to hear. Lay em’ on me.”

"You know, when this is all over, we should do something to celebrate." Keith tells Shiro over lunch one day. In hindsight, he should have known it would be a bad idea, since their coworkers don't know how to mind their own business. 

"We already got a plan!" Lance butts in from across the room, mouth so full of burger as he speaks that it's amazing Allura doesn’t breakup with him right then and there. 

"Our traditional work celebration consists of dinner and drinks at our favorite bar." Allura finishes for Lance, handing her boyfriend a napkin with a roll of her eyes.

"Which bar?" Keith asks cautiously. Not because of his disapproval but, well, there are some places he would rather not revisit. 

"The Castle. Why?" Matt’s eyes narrowed in suspicion.

"Just nice to know." He tries to play off his relief as something more casual and normal, but Matt knows him too well to fall for that. 

"Keith Kogane. Are you, by chance, banned from certain bars in this town?" He smirks and Keith quickly shakes his head.

"I’m not banned, there are just certain bars I would like to avoid." He gives in to the Holt’s knowing stare, knowing that he'd never let it go. He’s probably already planning on moving his next few meetings around to do background checks on the nearest bars.

"Was it like, bar fights? Or weird drunk behavior?" Hunk asks at the same time Pidge inquires, "Which bar?"

"Um..." Keith hesitates, sneaking a glance at Shiro, who has chosen to remain silent for this portion of the conversation. He’s looking slightly intrigued and a little amused, and a plan forms in his mind. "Mostly bar fights. In my defense, It was all guys who hadn't learned the meaning of the word 'no'."

Keith feels Shiro tense, able to read between the lines of the story. These were guys that had been harassing Keith; Sexually.

Shiro is a very protective guy. He got jealous easily, even though he knew Keith was never going to go home with anyone else. He was never a dick about it to Keith. He'd take it all out on whatever poor unsuspecting soul was stupid enough to make a move on Keith in the vicinity of Shiro.

Like James Griffin, for example. He's from the EMFs (Keith swore to Shiro that it stands for ‘Extreme Mother Fuckers’ considering James is such an asshole), a team that Allura brought in to help finish construction on the bikes.

Keith actually remembers James from College. They were in the same year; same program and Keith totally kicked his ass in a fight at a frat party.

He had rudely reminded Keith that he and Shiro were not officially dating and that Shiro would probably be better off taking someone else home from the party. James got a solid punch to the nose and Keith got some phenomenal marathon sex that sparked a bit of a praise kink once he expressed his jealousy to Shiro. 

The second he saw James in the hallway his fingers twitched at his side, already prepared to knock him out right there and then, but James was a step ahead and stopped him. James gives him a warm, welcoming smile and instantly apologizes to Keith for the past, and goes into how he's happy to see Keith is doing alright and that he's still with Shiro. Which unfortunately, Keith has to correct him and inform him that he and Shiro are not actually dating. Never were. Still aren’t. 

James was shocked _._ "I thought you two were that forever couple, I was honestly a little jealous."Instead of moving on with his life, James has made it his mission to make Shiro jealous. 

Anytime James is in the same room as Shiro, he makes it a point to bring up Keith. Usually his physical appearance such as loudly and awkwardly exclaiming, "Dude, you're so much hotter than when we were in college. What is your workout routine?" Or "how did you get such an ass? Do you do squats? That's a seriously nice ass dude." 

Apparently, he'll even talk about Keith when he's not there. He asked Lance pointedly and loudly if Keith was single while in the breakroom with Shiro. It's only working because Shiro is too consumed in his irrational jealousy to realize that James is dating his teammate, Kinkade and has no actual intention or desire to get with Keith. James butts in when everyone is discussing celebration plans. 

"Keith, you should totally join us. We're going to the fighter pilot bar on main street. They've got great drinks, good music, a good crowd if you're looking for a little extra fun." James offers. Beside him on the couch, Shiro stiffens up and instinctively moves a bit closer to Keith. Keith can tell he’s trying his hardest to reign in his protective instinct. 

"I'll pass. I'm going stick with my team." He declines, and Shiro relaxes once again.

Keith's not entirely comfortable with James jealousy plan, but it’s surprisingly effective. Maybe desperate times call for desperate measures. 

It was nearing the end of the day, the sun already tucking itself behind the skyline. Keith had just finished up his last meeting for today and was heading to his office to sketch out some of the newer amendments made over the course of the last few weeks when sounds stopped him. The noises he heard from the breakroom gave him pause. Creeping up to the slightly askew door, he peeked in to find Hunk and Shiro bending over the kitchen table.

“And you’ll...”

“This right ? How long should I wait before I can plate it?”

“Just a few minutes. I do have a question, though, why the sudden need for these kinds of recipes, anyway?”

“I want to make sure he’s getting enough for the day. He doesn’t seem to bring lunch and everyone’s dinner is either leftovers or more caffeine, so I want to make his breakfast as nutritionally dense as possible to help him get through the day.”

What were they talking about ? His mind wandering back throughout the day gave him his own answer.

Keith’s body froze. Being so busy with work had not left him much time to worry about nutritional needs or importance. His meals mostly considered of whatever Shiro brought him in the morning, and whatever was ordered for the late afternoon lunch. .

Growing up in Foster homes, food was always the last thing on his mind. He got used to long periods of accidental fasting. It wasn’t until college did Keith experience the ‘mother hen’ attitude of Shiro during their first exam season.

Keith had burrowed himself a nest in his dorm, a mountain of textbooks surrounding him in a protective barrier. He spent most of his time studying, and whatever remained, sleeping. When Shiro had finally knocked his door down after several days of missed messages, Keith got a stern lecture on the importance of health maintenance and wasn’t left alone for the rest of the exam week.

Glancing into the reflection of the glass wall on the opposite side of the hall, he did realize how different his exterior had become in the past week. Any stress would normally etch the faded black bags under his eyes, but the baggier clothes was something he had only experienced when Shiro had disappeared. When he set his mind to something, he wouldn’t let anything startle his focus.

Yet, Shiro had been attempting to take care of him even when they both were up to their necks in work, and Keith felt close to tears. Happy tears, mind you, but he truly missed their relationship, feeling protected and cared for. Growing up alone and having a glimpse into a loving relationship tore him apart when it was taken away from him. Having the possibility of it back was something he wanted more than anything.

* * *

Shiro doesn’t really like bars anymore. Or drinking. His preferred party type is getting together on a Friday or Saturday evening and eating junk food and playing games. Alcohol usually unnecessary.

He'll join in with a few drinks every now and then, but he doesn't get absolutely shit faced like he used to. He hasn’t since the spring break before his accident. That was when he somehow entered, and won, a keg stand competition and a beer pong competition in the same night which led to Keith having to nurse Shiro’s hangover for the rest of the week.

So, usually now, when his coworkers decide to celebrate with dinner and drinks, he skips the drinks part. 

But not this time. 

The tradition is that, historically, the most influential person in the project gets the opportunity to choose the restaurant, and for Voltron, it’s Keith.

Keith’s typical top pick is usually sushi, or Korean BBQ if they have the money. Shiro learned this pretty easily, as he’s the one who introduced Keith to both cuisines. Today though, He stares Shiro right in the eyes and states with no room for change, that he wants to go to the local steak house, knowing it’s Shiro’s favorite.

They have the absolute best 4 cheese, cast iron macaroni that Shiro adores. He could probably eat it every day for the rest of his life and never complain. Keith himself if always happy with a good steak but Shiro knows by that look in his eye that the location was chosen just for him.

When all their coworkers rush to leave for the bar, Shiro only goes with because Keith is going. He's backed out on pulling Keith aside to finally talk.

Every time he's gotten an opportunity, he dips out and turns in the opposite direction. He's scared of what Keith will say and that fear is paralyzing.

He goes to the bar with the team and he has a single drink, just enough for a little boost of liquid courage, but then he turns around and someone at the bar is buying Keith a drink and Keith's accepting. Keith usually turns guys down without a second thought, but he’s letting this guy flirt with him, like he’s entertaining the idea.

After the initial shock wearing off, Shiro straightens his back and orders another drink and his first shot of tequila in three years. The bartender gives him a small smirk after following his line of sight. She’s probably seen similar situations no less than a dozen times this week and helpfully mixes up a stronger drink for him. 

“I’m guessing you’re jealous?” A voice pops up, curious but not invasive. He turns to find Allura cautiously peering up at him. Her eyes, while kind, feel piercing at the moment. She had followed him to the bar after noticing the tension held in his shoulders.

“It’s complicated ”

“Relationships usually are. It took Lance and I years to finally push past our doubts and pursue a relationship, and now look at us. I know you’re afraid of how different you two are, how he might still not be ready, but stop looking at it from your view. You’re too invested to think objectively. What I see is someone who wants to try again but needed a while to properly evaluate if they would be emotionally prepared for it. That man over there is ready, he’s just struggling with moving forward again.”

“But he told me to give him time. To be patient.”

“Does that look patient to you? He’s ready. I’m cutting you off just so you can be sober enough to get your crap together and talk to him.” She warns him as she signals the bartender.

He's on his second drink and a single shot so he’s on the edge of tipsy, but he’s really tempted to ignore Allura’s order and call for another round when he notices Keith leave for the dance floor with a different guy. 

Watching Keith dance is almost too much. He's beautiful in every possible way. His hair is slowly coming out of its tight braid and there’s a slight sheen on his skin from the lights. His work shirt has been unbuttoned two too many times, and shows off just a little too much of his chest.

Shiro barely even resisters the next thing that Allura says to him, he's too fixated on watching Keith dance. He's not the best dancer, never has been, so he keeps it to a simple sway, his movements fluid. If there's anything Keith knows how to do its grind.

And that's what he does. He grinds on some random dude on the middle of the dance floor and the guys hands are a little too tight on Keith’s waist for Shiro’s liking. The stranger is pulling Keith close abruptly, and Shiro can’t help but notice the way Keith moves, trying to put some distance between them: He's uncomfortable. 

He's across the floor in seconds and he removes the random guy from Keith’s back with ease.

The man doesn’t protest for he takes one look at Shiro, who's taller and double his size, and books it without a second thought. 

Shiro takes his place. Sliding behind Keith like he has done a million times before. He always felt like they just perfectly fit together; two puzzle pieces made for each other. His hands rest gently, but firmly, on Keith’s hips. Keith leans back into the touch without batting an eye, relaxing.

"Shiro." He murmurs, Keith not needing to even turn around. Despite the volume of the music resounding around them, Keith didn't even spare him a glance.

"How do you know it's me?" He asks, leaning down to speak directly into Keith's ear with the pounding music as a flimsy excuse to do so. 

"No one touches me like you do." Keith's hand reaches up and locks behind Shiro’s neck to pull him down closer. Then attempts to continue the rhythmic grind he had going early. Shiro’s pants grow very tight very fast and he has to tighten his grip on those delicious hips in order for Keith to stop. Keith whines, attempting to wriggle even more, but before he can, Shiro whispers ,”Let's get out of here?”

They need to talk. But not here. Not right now. Not like this. Keith nods eagerly below him.

“Please."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shout out to my awesome Beta for really helping me bring this chapter to life! Couldnt have done it without them.   
> I really hope you guys liked this chapter, we're finally getting some progress with the boys.   
> and I am sorry to say that this fic is reaching it's end. There's only a few more chapters to go.   
> SO I thought I'd ask what else you guys would like to see from me? I've got a shit ton of Sheith wips ready to go, I just don't know where to start.   
> I've got some good old classic fake dating au, I've got so famous actor/body guard aus, some A/B/O stuff, an accidental sugar daddy au, another exes au set in a movie star universe because I am obsessed with 'used to date' trope, and I've got a couple other one shot meet-cute ideas.   
> Sooooo yeah. Lots of options.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shiro VERY obviously wants him. It's in the way he touches Keith, encircles him possessively. It's in his voice, desire mixed deliciously with jealousy and frustration as he hurriedly suggests they leave. 
> 
> Keith couldn’t get them out of the door any faster. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

He feels a little guilty for intentionally making Shiro jealous.

It's something he was never willing to do before. He feels guilty taking drinks from other guys and pretending to flirt with them when he knows he has no plans to go home with anyone that isn’t Shiro.

He's awkward as he speaks and uncomfortably stiff when he dances.

It's always been hard for him to be with anyone that's not Shiro, and now it's become nearly unbearable. But all that guilt flees when the frail, foreign arms that dig into his hips are replaced with the familiar feeling of Shiro's warm embrace.

He's a little embarrassed by how fast he melts against Shiro’s chest. A small part of him wishes to blame his shaky legs on being drunk, but the truth is that Keith is smart enough to never actually drink anything from strangers. He's not even tipsy on a single glass of rum and coke.

The slight bulge in Shiro’s slacks that presses against Keith's ass is entirely to blame. Yet, he honestly can't bring himself to care about his embarrassment.

He knew Shiro was never going to make the first move, even though Keith practically gave him the go ahead, and he was becoming impatient. He wanted Shiro but was still too scared by that slight possibility that Shiro might not want him in that way anymore. 

Shiro VERY obviously wants him. It's in the way he touches Keith, encircles him possessively. It's in his voice, desire mixed deliciously with jealousy and frustration as he hurriedly suggests they leave. 

Keith couldn’t get them out of the door any faster. 

They snag a cab right outside the bar and Shiro gives the driver his address. A fire lights in Keith’s gut, excitement and anticipation boiling up inside him.

Shiro’s taking him home.

Finally.

Fucking finally. 

The taxi driver is lucky that Keith’s only had a single drink because if he went beyond that, he'd have his mouth around Shiro’s cock the second the door shut. 

Instead, he rests a hand on Shiro’s thigh and smiles up at him. "Taking me home, huh?" He teases, just to see Shiro’s cheeks flush. 

"If that's alright with you." He hesitantly nods as Keith drums his fingers against the thick muscle of Shiro’s leg, hating the feeling of fabric right now.

"Wouldn't have left the bar if it wasn’t." He snickers in response, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. 

Of course, he wants this. He needs this.

He's made that so fucking obvious, but here Shiro is still doubting it. He can't wait till they're alone behind closed doors so he can show Shiro just how okay this is. 

The drive goes by fast, a whirlwind of crowds and stop lights. The bar was fairly close to the office, and Shiro, the practical man he is, chose an apartment complex close to it. 

He chose a fucking nice one too. Keith's really does look like a shoebox that someone fished out of a dumpster in comparison. 

It's one of those nice outdoor complexes, which highly contrasts the prison like cylinder building Keith lives in. The complex has a gym on-sight, a jogging trail, and an indoor sunroom pool with a hot tub. Keith's place doesn’t even have an on-sight laundry room. 

Shiro's apartment is the top apartment on a two-floor building. The patio balcony looks bigger than Keith's entire living room. 

Keith doesn’t get much time to check it out or appreciate it, though. He's only got a couple seconds after he steps inside before he gets his chance. The second he hears the soft click of the door shutting, officially signaling that they're alone, Keith breaks. He spins on Shiro, grabs ahold of Shiro’s tie and yanks him down.

"Finally," Keith breaths out against Shiro’s lips and he's so fucking close to getting to kiss the love of his life again, but then there's a hand on his arm that’s keeping him at bay.

"I’m sorry, Keith." Shiro starts, voice shy and uneven and Keith recoils, heart already beginning to fracture as his brain jumps to conclusions.

_He was wrong. Shiro doesn’t want him._

"We've been drinking. We can't do this right now." He continues, reaching for Keith's shoulders and pulling him back, trying to settle the fear he realizes he accidently set off. He can already see the tell-tale signs of Keith closing himself off.

"Shiro, I only had one drink," he argues, shaking his head; he's not drunk. He needs more than one drink to get drunk, and Shiro’s no lightweight either. He's in his right mind and it’s telling him that Shiro should be making love to him against the wall already.

"Doesn’t matter." Shiro sighs. "Keith, I can’t. I can’t stand the thought of you regretting this. If there’s even the smallest chance that you’ll wake up tomorrow not knowing why and not 100% okay with it, I’m not willing to go through that. I don’t want whatever happens between us to be dismissed by alcohol." He explains, and Keith finds it sweet that he's so concerned about his consent, but his sex drive is appalled. 

"Would you regret it?" Keith tosses right back at him. Shiro’s frown is telling enough, but Keith needs the actual words.

"I could never regret being with you, Keith. But I will regret not being able to remember every last detail of it. I've had a couple drinks Keith, a lot more than I’m used to having these days. I won't regret you, but I'd regret not being in my right mind." If he didn’t know any better, he'd think Shiro is stone cold sober. Keith, although, knows him well enough to see the slight glaze in his eyes and catch onto the occasional slur or stumble of his words.

Shiro is tipsy. 

Not drunk but clearly not sober, and Keith knows he's right.

If they do this now while Shiro has a few drinks in him, he'll accuse himself of 'pressuring' Keith since he's buzzed and Keith isn’t. That's not what Keith wants; he wants Shiro.

He needs them both to be perfectly sober so they're both on the exact same page of what they are now.

"Fine." Keith gives in. 

"Thank you," Shiro whispers, sighing in relief.

A strange silence that settles over them for a moment. 

"I can't believe you're letting me go to bed this frustrated though." Keith complains and Shiro’s chuckle is dark and deep with a hint of pride knowing he got Keith riled up.

"Come on." He shakes his head, leading Keith through the apartment to the master bedroom. Keith could live peacefully in Shiro’s walk in closet; it was that large.

"Here." Shiro enters the closet and returns with a plain black t-shirt, handing it to Keith. "That door leads to the bathroom and that one has extra blankets in case you get cold. I’ll stay on the couch for tonight. Let me know if you need anything else." Shiro is quick to leave, but Keith stops him at the doorway by grabbing him by the forearm.

"Thank you," he laughs quietly. This time when he pulls Shiro down to him, he goes to kiss his cheek and isn’t rejected this time. When Shiro pulls back his eyes are dark, and his jaw is clenched tight. He's struggling to hold himself back.

"Good night, Keith."

It's safe to say that Keith does not have a good night. 

He tries to sleep wearing Shiro’s shirt, yet, having his (incredibly warm and comfortable) bed, surrounded by Shiro’s scent, and knowing that Shiro is just down the hall sleeping on the couch wasn’t helping his erection. Shiro’s afraid of losing his control with Keith, and Keith? Undeniably frustrated, but still horny. 

Keith barely sleeps, mainly rolling around praying that his excess energy will just burn out on its own, but it doesn’t. He spends hours staring at the dark ceiling of Shiro’s room, daydreaming about what he would be doing right now if they both weren’t such cowards. He could be getting slammed into Shiro’s soft cotton sheets right now. He’s painfully hard in his boxers right now and unfortunately, he has just enough dignity left in him to decide that jerking off in Shiro’s apartment right now would be in poor taste.

Besides, he knows that nothing he could do to himself right now would even remotely satisfy him, not when his heart and brain knows that he could have Shiro instead.

By the time Keith finally falls asleep, he wakes up not much later, frustrated and grumpy. His hard on has finally wilted, along with most of his hope.

Keith stumbles into the kitchen around six in the morning, not at all surprised to find Shiro waiting for him with a hot pot of coffee and oh god is that an omelet? When did Shiro learn how to make an omelet? It smells heavenly.

"Morning." He greets Shiro with a tired mumble as he all but launches himself at the bright red mug that he knows Shiro set out for him. Shiro is the kind of dork that color coordinates their things, and anything red has historically been Keith’s. 

"Good morning," Shiro responds. He turns to smile at Keith, but is stunned into silence.

Keith slept in the shirt Shiro gave him, not bothering to get dressed before entering the kitchen. He's wearing nothing but a pair of tight black briefs that aren’t even visible due to the oversized tee. The hem hits mid-thigh and Keith notices the obvious yearning in Shiro’s gaze.

"Keep staring and you’re going to burn my breakfast," He chastises.

Shiro, who has clearly forgotten all about the food on the stove in favor of admiring Keith's legs, freezes at getting called out.

"Right." He blinks, turning back to the stove, stiff, and it makes Keith laugh. He finishes their food and in a few minutes, a plate with a beautifully golden yellow omelet is being slid in front of Keith.

"Since when do you know how to make omelets?" Keith asks, not wasting a single second before digging into his food. It's filled with gooey melted cheese and bacon bits and it's not even burnt. It's perfectly cooked. Shiro tried to make an omelet once in college, but it turned out as rubbery, burnt scrambled eggs sprinkled with cheese. Keith still ate it because he loved Shiro and refused to disappoint him, but refused to admit the food poisoning afterwards was a result of it.

"Hunk taught me." Shiro mumbles his explanation, his face a little flushed. Keith’s heart does a little dance in his chest.

His suspicion was confirmed; Shiro really did go out of his way to learn some recipes from Hunk. All so he can feed Keith: So, he can take care of him. So, he can make him happy. When Keith eats this time, he can feel his heart swell with joy.

Keith scarfs his food down fast. Both Shiro and the rest of his family constantly tease him for the way he eats. They tell him he 'eats like a prisoner,' but Shiro doesn’t say anything this time; Not a single word about Keith's eating habits. He simply watches him out of the corner of his eye, a little smile on his lips until Keith gets up from his seat and carries his dish over to the sink.

They've always had the silent rule that whoever doesn’t cook, does the cleaning. It was just the fair thing to do. A moment later and Shiro is standing directly behind Keith, slipping his plate into the sink.

"Thank you." He mumbles, and before he can step away, Keith leans back against Shiro's chest. He drops his weight so that Shiro has to support him. 

"I'm sorry for last night," Shiro begins. He continues only when Keith lets out a small, confused hum. "I rushed you out of there when you were having fun. I just, I can't stand seeing you with someone else. I know I don't have a right to that anymore, but the idea of you going home with someone else..." He trails off, mostly because Keith has twisted in his grasp to glare at him.

"Shiro. I wanted you to take me home." He clarifies, and Shiro stares at him as if he's suddenly lost the capability to speak English.

"You know damn well that nobody makes me do anything I don't want to do. If you didn't take me home, I would have gotten shit-face and taken an Uber home. I was not going home with anyone else but you.”

Keith huffs out a breath, taking a small pause, “I can't. There isn't anyone else for me."

Keith’s got pages and pages of pre-meditated poetry that he's spent years practicing aloud in his living room at three in the morning when he fantasizing about what he’d say in case they were ever reunited. 

Shiro never lets him give that speech though. There are lips suddenly against his and he's not complaining in the slightest because that kiss is better than any pre-prepared words he could have possibly said.

"God, I've missed you." Shiro mumbles against his lips, his breath is hot, and it sends tingles to all the right places. Keith can't agree more.

"I missed you too, I don't want to wait anymore, Shiro. I can't," He whines, tugging Shiro back into another searing kiss.

Kissing Shiro again is like magic. That's the only possible way to describe it. Everything inside him just bursts into flames in the best way and it feels like he's floating. Everything else in the world just vanishes. It's just him, and Shiro, who grabs at the back of Keith's thighs and lifts him as if he weighed nothing. Thrill runs through him as he coils around Shiro, legs and arms wrapping around his torso and neck.

The kissing doesn’t stop. There's kisses pressed to his lips, his cheeks, his nose, his forehead, his neck, his shoulder. It doesn’t stop until the second his back hits the bed. 

"Are you sure this is alright?" Shiro asks, towering over Keith at the edge of the bed. He looks at Keith with such dark, hungry eyes that he can't help but nods his head eagerly.

"You're a couple hours late." He jokes, since he tried to make it clear this is what he wanted last night, but that was apparently a message that went right over Shiro's head.

"Better late than never" Shiro laughs, deep and throaty as he leans down over Keith to pepper his neck in more kisses; each one burning Keith up with desire. 

"I'd prefer now." He complains, a soft moan building in his throat as gentle kisses turn into sucking and biting, no doubt leaving an obvious array of marks. Keith's never been so happy about hickies before in his life. 

“Stars, you look so good in my clothes,” Shiro mumbles, “Always look so good.” The praise sends a painful jolt of arousal straight to Keith’s dick. Shiro is quick to mark his territory, kissing and nipping his neck. The mumbled praises let Shiro’s soft breath run along his skin, the nerves in Keith’s body absolutely haywire. Shiro’s flesh and bone hand wanders underneath his t-shirt in an effort to familiarize himself with the alterations the years apart have taken on them, quick in making work of removing what little clothing Keith had on.

The soft nips to his neck had shot his nerves, no longer able to tell the difference between pain and pleasure, not that he cared at this point. Every new explored area sends another jolt of electricity down his spine in an attempt to hurry Shiro up. His hands grasp for anything solid around him, afraid he’ll lose the moment if he can’t physically grab onto it.

Shiro’s curious hands start pushing the hem of his shirt up, pulling it up and off and tossing it somewhere it won’t be easily found.

“I guarantee you look better out of yours.” Keith counters, tugging at the plain white t-shirt Shiro wears. He’s met with laughter, kisses, and his hands on Shiro’s bare chest as his reward. For a moment, Shiro pauses, glancing at his own chest before glancing back to Keith.

“Not anymore.”

It’s a whisper that’s barely there, Keith not even sure he really hears it. Yet, in the case he really does hear Shiro talking shit on his own body, Keith vows to have him never think that again.

He pushes theirs bodies with all the strength he’s got, flipping them over so Keith can straddle Shiro’s waist.

If Keith was given the opportunity to show Shiro how much he adored his body, he would. Shiro was stubborn when it came to himself, something Keith has especially taken note of recently. His body image has tanked, and any physical compliment was one he’d brush off. While Keith knew his words alone wouldn’t fix the issue, he wanted to at least leave no doubt that Keith loved him, no matter what he looked like.

Thinking for a moment, Keith straightens his back and smiles down at Shiro. Not breaking eye contact, Keith gently grasps Shiro’s hair and twists his face to give him a better angle of his neck. Leaning down, he can feel his own breath, warm and radiating off of Shiro. Pressing soft, loving kisses, he whispers loud enough for Shiro to understand, but no louder than that. “You’re so beautiful.” Another kiss. “Wanted to do this for so long, could spend hours cherishing you”. He can feel the goosebumps forming on Shiro’s arms, his breath quickening, and Keith feels the warmth developing and growing in the bottom of his stomach. He’s already terrible hard, boxers and patience straining, but he pushes that to the back of his mind for favor of Shiro.

“You’re incredible, Shiro. Inside and out. Only want you, I’ll only ever want you. You’re perfect for me.” Keith will always hate the scars, knowing they mean Shiro had to go through such pain, but they're not ugly to him. Nothing about Shiro could ever be ugly to him.

The original tension Shiro had held about his post-accident figure seemed to, albeit reluctantly, melt off. Keith’s soft compliments seemed to lure Shiro into a state of mind where those didn’t need to be on the forefront of his worries, hopefully completely focusing on Keith.

Compliments and praises are murmured every so often as he gently explored the planes of Shiro’s chest, marking every dip and valley he can find with his fingertips. Keith removes his own shirt in the meantime, giving something for Shiro to view while Keith explores. Slowly, well, as slow as he can manage, he slides one of his hands into his boxers to give himself a firm press. Shiro bucks up in response, the straining pajama pants doing nothing to alleviate himself.

Looking up, Keith notices the dark look on Shiro’s face, a desperate need clouding his eyes. Feeling desired is something Keith has desperately missed and having the man he adored below him fueled it further. As much as he wanted to tease Shiro, he needed something in him within the next few minutes or else he’d lose his mind.

“Do you want me, Shiro?” Desire and lust swirled in Shiro’s pupils, lost and hazy as he absorbs Keith’s words and touch.

“Yes. Please.” He whines, practically beg and it makes Keiths knees feel weak.

“Alright big boy, make me cum.”

The speed in which Shiro had them flipped over knocks the air out of Keiths lungs. He blinks a few times, suddenly face to face with the ceiling. Lips were upon his skin immediately and the sudden sensation had Keith writhing. He had spent months dreaming of this moment, dreaming Shiro would take him and love him but now that it was actually happening? Pure euphoria.

Scrambling for the bedside drawer, he yanked open the drawer with a loud shutter and grasped for a bottle he knew would reside there. Sure enough, a few seconds of scratching at the wood led to Keith finding the light bottle, half used but just enough left.

“Half used, huh? What were you thinking about, big guy?” Shiro is clearly distracted by Keiths chest as he places loving but rough hickies everywhere he can reach, but he takes a moment to mumble against Keith’s skin.

“You. So pretty, so fucking hot. been wanting to fuck you for months, baby.” The old name still makes Keith blush a bit, he loves it so much. Shiro packs so much love and admiration in the name.

Shiro is warm and strong and he puts all that preaching about patience into practice by torturing Keith. He’s extra gentle with Keith, one finger probing his rim as he checks in with Keith, murmuring soft praises into his hair when he finally pushes inside.

It's probably the slowest sex they've ever had. Not like they ever rushed through it before, but they, without a doubt, take their time with one another. They don’t need to relearn much about eachothers bodies, but after years of being apart, they want to take the time to do it anyway.

The third finger was a stretch, exhilarating and pleasurable. Keith couldn’t remember the last time he had sex. He knows the last time he had good sex though, and that was the morning Shiro’s flight had taken off. No one else could please him the way Shiro could, and he’s gone three years without it.

“Please! just fuck me! I’m ready, I swear!” Keith has long passed the point of dignity, begs and pleas falling out of his mouth as easily as breathing. Shiro knew how to hit Keith’s prostate every time, spot on, but he makes a point of just barely brushing it

“Shh, I’ll give it to you soon, alright ? Just need you to relax a little more, baby.” Keith was purring inside, immediately slumping further into the soft sheets below him. After a few more moments, the pleasure had begun to blur, the focus on how Shiro’s hair was dripping with sweat and his arm steadily applying pressure to Keith’s hip began to fade. All he could feel was the heavy cloud desire floating in his brain, only able to focus on Shiro.

“I’m going to put it in now, alright? Tell me to stop if you need to.” As Shiro lines himself up with Keiths hole, His other hand gently cups Keith’s sweaty face, and Keith turns and nuzzles into it. Making eye contact with Shiro, Keith licks his palm, slowly sucking one of the digits into his mouth to swirl his tongue around it. The metal is surprisingly warm and has an almost silent hum of whirring gears. The sound was only typically audible when Shiro was really exerting himself. Shiro gasps and pushes the head of his cock in.

The first intrusion is something that almost had Keith cumming on the spot. Memories of all the times before came back like a freight train, emotions and feelings not far behind.

The first time they had tried this, Shiro had been gentle and made sure to voice everything he was doing to make sure Keith wouldn’t be unprepared. The narrations were kind of awkward, but soon enough, Shiro was able to turn it into a surprisingly hot, dirty talk. When it was over, Keith was shocked to find that those dirty words came out of Takashi Shirogane’ s mouth, but never complained.

The adoring look Shiro gave him as he held Keith steady, forcefully thrusting in and nailing his prostate was an out of body experience. He could feel his nerves lighting up and the sheets underneath him, but his brain was in a constant stream of ‘ _I love you. I love you. Takashi Shirogane, I love you.’_

Keith wailed as Shiro mercilessly fucked deeper into Keith’s hole. The pressure had built up, an orgasm rapidly approaching, and Keith went to slide his hand down his chest to touch his dick but was stopped by a strong grip.

“No, I know you can do this without touching yourself. Be a good for me and come on my cock, alright Baby?” The gravelly voice and dark look from Shiro was the last push Keith needed, tension snapping. He obeys, eager to behave for Shiro. Always so eager for him. And he’s right.

A few more thrusts and Keith was screaming as he cummed. He blacked out for a few moments as Shiro pushed a few more thrusts before following behind, a comfortable warmth filling Keith.

\--

While Shiro adored the foreplay and intercourse, it was always the after affects that brought him the most joy. He pulled out as gently as he could, watching as thick globs of cum dripped out of Keith’s red, puffy hole. A deep satisfaction within him hummed approvingly. Keith was out of sorts, eyes closed and breathing heavily. 

The first time it happened, Shiro became terrified. Keith had stopped responding in the midst of an intense session and stopped speaking altogether. Shiro had called Matt in a frenzy at two in the morning for help, desperate for any sort of advice.

After getting laughed at for several minutes, (and Shiro can’t blame him because he began the call with “ _I think I fucked Keith into unconsciousness?”_ ) Matt was able to explain the quick jist of what Keith was experiencing. ‘Subspace’, he had said. He also had sent over some more links of the topic after their call so Shiro would be able to read up on it later.

Shiro grabbed a small washcloth from the linen closet and wet it before returning to the bed with some bottled water. Cleaning up Keith was always easy, for he became pliant after a good fucking, letting Shiro work fast and thorough before cuddling with him.

Holding him close and kissing the top of his head again just knowing that Keith still wants to be with him is the best feeling in the world. But, of course, all good things eventually end. 

The dark cloud that blocks off his sunshine this morning comes in the form of a text message from Allura, reminding him that they do still have to be at work this afternoon. She signed it with a 'P.S: Should I bother sending the same text to Keith?' 

He doesn’t bother responding, and never hears Keith's phone buzz.

Every time Shiro reminds Keith that they have to get up, he's met with an annoyed grumble, having Keith’s face further nuzzled into his chest.

Eventually they settle on Shiro having to pick up Keith like a bride and carry him into the shower. 

Keith demands on keeping some of his dignity by having the option to change, and they drive to his place so he can get clean clothes. He could practically hear the wolf whistles he’d get after arriving at work with what he wore last night. Shiro doesn't add that he should probably already prepare himself for that situation based on Allura’s text.

The ride is anti-climactic. Arriving at Keith’s apartment, Shiro is shocked into a stunned silence for a very long list of reasons:

  1. It's in a terrible part of town, fairly far away from the office. 
  2. It's ridiculously small. Keith's whole apartment is the size of Shiro's living room.
  3. He's paying way too much for something of this size. 
  4. There's a wolf. that is apparently a dog. A very, _very,_ big dog named Kosmo. Kosmo is an extremely good boy who seems to like Shiro very much. 
  5. There's no furniture. At all. Keith has nothing in his apartment besides a mattress and a couple boxes in the bedroom. No couch. No table. No TV. No dresser. Nothing. 



"Why don't you have anything here?" He eventually asks, sitting on the floor as he rubs Kosmo's belly and waits for Keith to finish getting dressed.

"I don't know. I've only been here for a little under a year? I just, it didn’t feel like home. Nothing ever feels like home anymore, so I just don't bother filling it." Keith shrugs, a little frown on his lips that’s almost a pout, but if Shiro called it that, Keith would kick his ass.

The way he says 'home' is pointed, and he glances at Shiro nervously, almost hopefully as he says it. It resonates with him, for Shiro feels the same way. He loves his apartment, but something has always been missing from it, or rather, someone. It’s been missing since the day he got on a plane.

"Move in with me." He finds himself saying it suddenly, without hesitation, and doesn’t find himself regretting it.

"What?" Keith stutters, suddenly frozen in spot, pants only halfway tugged up his legs.

"Move in with me." He sucks in a deep breath, keeping his eyes on Kosmo as he rambles. He won’t regret offering, but he will regret pushing Keith, or thinking they were on the same page when they weren’t. They had been pretty far into their relationship before they left, and while the time apart could have set them back, it still felt natural to associate the word ‘home’ with ‘Keith’.

"My apartment is big enough for both of us, and it's closer to work. It's pet friendly, there's even a dog park down the street, so Kosmo would love it. You can stay in the guest room so you can have your own space, or we could use that room as a studio.” He offers, trying to sell it best he can. Each word becomes shakier as the proposition catches up with him.

It's probably not the best idea to ask Keith to move in with him only a few hours after they've gotten back together, or... well, since they had sex again; they haven’t even really had the official talk yet.

He's about to open his mouth and take it back, apologies already lined up, when Keith yanks his pants all the way up, and plops himself down into Shiro’s lap. He smothers his words with a firm kiss. 

"I'd love that,” Keith breathes, leaning in and pressing their foreheads together, “I love you." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed it!  
> Thanks to my awesome Beta for helping me fill in some major portions of the smut!   
> There's one more chapter coming ya'll  
> and I'll hopefully be adding some other fics as well :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While shopping, Keith mentioned off-handedly that they were going to make this the best Christmas ever and a massive light-bulb sprung up over Shiro’s head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which the boys have finally got their shit together

The launch went exactly as planned.

The Holts were put on security, working with Keith and the Olkari to create a nearly impenetrable computer program. That was the original idea anyway, but upon further discussions, they took it one step further: they left some gaps in the defense. Enough that if the Galra tried hard enough, they’d eventually get in, or so they’d think: They’d find a false system, with false blueprints. Keith created a complete blueprint of a faulty bike.

He knows that the Galra won’t look for minor details and that they’ll just send it off to be made. They’re all about quantity, not quality so Keith slipped a little something into the blueprint; Matt called it ‘the porn virus of mechanics.’ They’ll be so busy with everything else that they won’t even notice the little game of shuffle he’s played with the parts, but it’s guaranteed to ruin the whole thing after a bit of time. 

Sure enough, they got their hands on his self-destructive design, and not long after did they announce that they’d be releasing a new product ( obviously skipping over crucial tests ) as predicted.

Not even a full week after the Galra started releasing their ‘Centurions’ to the public, people began reporting issues and the company had to do a full recall, not being able to explain why their bikes were just falling apart on people.

This is when Altea launched their Voltron Lion Series, featuring several well-made and personal commercials, courtesy of one of the EMFS; Ryan Kinkade.

The commercials didn’t feature actors, but instead the leads of the project. Pidge and Matt did commercials for the Green Lion, highlighting it’s tech genius. Hunk showed off the strong stability of the Yellow Lion while Allura and Lance did Advertisement for Blue’s family friendly life-style. Keith was featured speeding like a mad man on red, and Shiro, in all his glory, displayed the Black Lions power. They were all shit actors but that was sort of the point: they weren’t actors, they were real people.

The launch was a total success, the Galra are being sued by multiple customers and investigated for falsifying test results. The pre-orders for the Lions are almost more than what they can keep up with.

This really is Keith’s dream job. He gets to do what he loves and he loves his coworkers. Yeah, sometimes they’re a little too much, and Lance and Griffin can sure be a pain in the ass every now and then, but he still loves them. Meetings often turn into just spit-balling ridiculous ideas for the heck of it. It’s all playful banter and bickering about things they’re passionate about and he gets payed for it.

Keith makes enough money to pay off his debts from his younger days, pay his bills every month, put a bit into three separate savings accounts, have money to go out and have fun on his off time, and donate to the Blades of Marmora Charities.

But the best part is Shiro.

Keith now gets to wake up to the love of his life, every single morning. Some people might not want to work at the same place as their spouse but Shiro and Keith love it.

And at the end of the day? They go home together. They crawl into bed together and they fall asleep together.

Obviously, Keith took Shiro’s offer to move in but not right away. No, they decided to take it in small steps.

The first week Keith just spent a few nights there, then a few more the next week. The week after that he spent almost every night at Shiro’s place. He only took one night at his own place and even that was painful. They started moving some of Keith’s things over the next day.

The last thing they moved into Shiro’s apartment was Kosmo.

Keith was a little nervous but the moment they walked into the apartment, Keith finds that Shiro had went on a doggy shopping trip just to make Kosmo feel welcome. He has a dog bed in every room of the house, even the patio, and Shiro had a doggy door installed. He bought Kosmo treats and toys and new food bowls meaning it’s safe to say the Kosmo, in all his spoiled glory, has chosen Shiro as his new favorite parent.

It’s been a little over six months since they officially moved in together; seven months since they got back together. At first their friends, while happy for them, were a little worried; they thought they were moving a bit too fast. Moving in a month after being back together?

Matt was the most successful as he was the only one of their friends who actually saw what they looked like before. He could best articulate for the others that this month-long gap was actually really slow for them.

Keith actually doesn’t know what Matt told them, not really. He wasn’t there.

Matt gave him a brief summary afterwards, telling the couple that he handled their friends worries which sounded pretty suspicious, but it got the others off his back so he’s not too worried about it. Now everything has begun to settle down into a blissful sense of normalcy.

He and Shiro have settled into a solid routine, working together around the house almost seamlessly. It’s natural to be together. The others seemed a little shocked at how perfectly and easily that they adjust, clicking back together as a couple.

Christmas is coming up soon and Shiro’s made it a point to make it a big deal for them. At the start of December, Shiro insisted they go out and buy Christmas decorations, seeing that neither of them actually owned any.

Keith hasn’t been much in the Christmas Spirit these last few years, and apparently Shiro hasn’t either but now that they’re together again they were both super excited and ready for the holiday season. They bought a Christmas tree, tinsel, and stockings. They hung mistletoe in every room ( as if they need any more of an excuse to smother each other in physical affection ).

The only thing is, Keith still doesn’t know what to get for Shiro. Keith definitely wants to get him something, and he wants it to be something special and memorable since it is their first Christmas back together. He thought about everything: clothes, trinkets, books, games, food, gift-cards, stuff for the house. He’s thought of it all, but nothing is good enough; nothing seems worthy of Shiro.

He knows he’s being ridiculous for whatever he gives Shiro, he knows his boyfriend will love it. For fucks sake, Shiro still has that dumb little NASA keychain that Keith gave him years ago.

Shiro would be happy with anything Keith gives him, but that’s not enough for Keith.

He’s been stumped on what to get for weeks now, and he’s running out of time but everything comes together late one night when Shiro is cooking dinner. Keith’s in their room putting away their clean laundry, humming softly to himself.

Shiro’s a very neat and meticulous guy, so even though Keith himself isn’t, he makes a point of perfectly folding and organizing all of his boyfriend’s clothes.

So, when Keith opens up his sock drawer to find it in a complete disarray, he’s shocked and a little confused, but starts to reorganize. He pulls out all the loose socks only to find a little black box at the very bottom staring up at him; he doesn’t have to open it to know what it is.

He stares at it, frozen in shock, unsure of what to do or say. He just stares at it, a flood of emotions washing over him: excitement, happiness, love. He hovers above their dresser, thinking to himself over and over again: _“He wants to marry me. We’re going to get married. He’s going to be my husband.”_ Nothing else has ever felt so right in his life.

He tosses all the socks back in the drawer and runs to closet, suddenly hit with inspiration. At the very bottom of that box, is the sketch book Shiro gave him years ago.

The pages are worn and slightly frayed but hold together quite well for its age. Running his hand down the soft cover, he flips it open and smiles to himself.

_To Keith,_

_Your talent is amazing, and you deserve something that can properly hold it. I hope you’ll fill this with all your beautiful work._

_Merry Christmas,_

_Shiro_

The note had been scrawled in with Shiro’s child-like handwriting on the inside cover flap.

It still has a few empty pages in it for he couldn’t bring himself to fill it when he thought Shiro was dead.

Keith knows Shiro as well as he knows himself and he’s confident Shiro’s going to pop the question Christmas morning. It’ll be the best damn Christmas present ever, and he’ll be totally prepared for it.

He gets to work sketching, and never does get to put the rest of their clean clothes away that night.

* * *

Every night for the last seven months Shiro’s looked at that damn ring box. After a couple months, he felt not necessarily ready, but sort of obligated, like he can’t possibly wait any longer. Yet, he could never find the right time and he started to get afraid that he’d lose the chance altogether if he waited any longer. He started thinking that maybe he should just pop the question randomly one night before bed or during dinner to just get it over with.

He rationalized that thought out the window. Keith deserves better than that.

He gets the idea for his master plan one Saturday morning in late November, when they’re doing the shopping for their Christmas decorations.

After their really non-existent Thanksgiving, they started talking about the Holidays: how neither of them had really celebrated it since College and what they did together back then.

They started making all kinds of plans. They started plotting out the perfect gifts for all their friends, and all of Keith’s family, including Kosmo.

While shopping, Keith mentioned off-handedly that they were going to make this the best Christmas ever and a massive light-bulb sprung up over Shiro’s head. Their history of Shiro giving Keith a Christmas present back in college for the first time since his father died made it the perfect moment to propose.

He decides that Christmas morning, when they’ll be alone for quite a bit before heading over to see Keith’s family, would be the ideal time. He knows they’ll probably curl up on the couch with their food and their coffee and watch a cheesy Christmas movie, and that will be the best time to propose.

He puts his plan in motion by telling Krolia first. It’s not really an ‘asking permission’ thing, but more of a Shiro already has a weekly solo lunch with his soon-to-be mother-in-law scheduled. He and Keith have lunch with her once a week too. Every now and then they also join Krolia and occasionally the other Blades for dinner, or they volunteer at the shelter.

So, he tells her very bluntly (it’s her preferred method of conversation) that he is going to ask her son to marry him and she thinks it’s a wonderful idea. Well, her exact words were “It took you long enough.” She told him that while it may seem a bit fast for some people, her son has never been known to take it slow. She says that all two people need is a solid ground beneath their feet, and a lot of love in their heart.

He knows that she’s right for she’s always right. Some people are going to think that this is a little fast. Their own friends thought they were going too quickly when they heard they were moving in together.hen They dated for over a little over a year and then they had to spend three very long and very painful years apart, and he never wants to be apart from him again.

He knows, with complete certainty, that he loves Keith. He always has, and he always will. There is not a force in the whole universe that could change that and he knows now that Keith feels the same way. They’ve both made it abundantly clear that they don’t ever want to lose the other again so why not take that step and get married. Why not try their hand at a ‘happily ever after’? They deserve it.

Shiro does not tell anyone else. Matt knows he still has the ring, but that doesn’t mean he knows Shiro plans to actually use it soon.

He refuses to tell him, because he knows he’ll tell the others, and he can’t have them knowing for two very simple reasons:

One is that he does not want any of their ‘worries’ to get to him. They all mean well but they don’t know Keith like he does. They didn’t feel the years of heartbreak that Keith and Shiro did from being apart.

Allura and Lance might understand if he phrased it right and got them to imagine it, putting themselves in his shoes. They’d jump right to marriage; they wouldn’t want to wait another second and neither does Shiro.

His second reason is because they have a Christmas Eve party to attend to at Allura’s house, and everyone is going to get absolutely thrashed because Matt likes spiking Hunk’s Eggnog when the Chef isn’t looking. None of them can withhold secrets when drunk. They will instantly start blabbing about the proposal or probably out right ask Keith if he’s excited to get married or congratulating him.

He doesn’t need any of that.

None of them get to know, and he acts as normal as possible during the event. Matt asks him what he got Keith for Christmas, and Shiro tells him a new sketchbook. He bought it with no other questions.

It’s not much of a party, admittedly.

Shiro refuses to drink the eggnog after it’s been drowned in rum. They exchange gifts and gorge themselves on a five-star meal of roast beef, potatoes, carrots, and green-beans, stuffed mushrooms, and macaroni and cheese. Everything courtesy of Hunk. Plus some little appetizers curtesy of Lance and Allura. (The Holt family hosts, and therefore escapes having to bring food.)

Shiro and Keith got put in charge of dessert, so they made Cookies (Gingerbread, Sugar, Chocolate Chip), Mini Apple Pie Bites, and a red velvet swirl cheesecake. It was a whole day worth of baking fun and messes in their kitchen. They made everything, for both their friend’s party and Keith’s family, in one shot.

After that, everyone is too full and tipsy to do much of anything, so they play a few games and eventually call it a night when Lance passes out drunk in the middle of Mario Kart.

Shiro and Keith at least wait until they get home to pass out. Shiro wakes up at two in the morning to put things in the stockings that they both swore were going to be just decoration, only to find stuff already in them. He smiles and adds his own things to each of them. A couple different kinds of dogs treats, a really big rawhide bone, and a new ‘indestructible’ ball for Kosmo ( Shiro gives it a day to live ). And little things for Keith like hair ties and snacks and those nice charcoal pencils he loves.

Instead of heading back to bed right away, he decides to sneak out onto the patio for a bit to calm his nerves.

He leans against the railing, eyes glued to the stars above. The sky was surprisingly dark amidst the city lights, the occasional flicker of a café shutting off as the night went on. Christmas lights flickered among the night. The ring box in his robe pocket feels heavier then it really is, and he suddenly realizes that there is one person he was supposed to talk to before getting married.

“Hey, grandpa. It’s been a while since we spoke, huh?” Shiro sighs, a small smile forming on his face, remembering that Keith actually insisted on making a memorial to Shiro’s grandfather, something Shiro himself had neglected to consider.

His original grave was placed in Japan, obviously, and they held a small ceremony once Shiro came out of his coma. Keith was the one who set up a picture of his grandpa in the living room, with a few candles and his favorite flowers around the frame. Right here on the patio, where he ‘can enjoy the night air’, as Keith put it. Which is really fitting for his grandfather, They both had a deep love for the stars, Shiro learning everything he knew from his grandfather.

“Hi Grandpa… I am sorry it’s been a while…I can’t visit you right now but I’m hoping I’ll be able to soon.” He takes a deep breath, glancing at the glossy photo of his grandfather, the man who raised him, the only family he’s ever really known.

“I’m going to ask the love of my life to marry me, Grandpa. His name is Keith, and he’s a talented artist. I know you’ve heard me ramble about him a million times by now. Matt sure got tired of them but you always encouraged me to go on, speak my mind.” He hesitates for a second, tapping at the railing. He shouldn’t be so nervous about talking to a man that probably can’t hear him. But he still needs to do this, for himself. Like he was supposed to all those years ago.

“It’s been a bit of a rough road for us, especially with three years apart, but I truly can’t imagine my life without him.”

His grandfather originally was supposed to be such a big part of this. He was going to be involved in everything, the ring, the ceremony. Shiro was even hoping to honey-moon in Japan.

“I am so sorry that you can’t be here to see this… to meet him. I know you would love him, and I know you would be so proud of me for taking this step. Thank you, for everything, Grandpa. You’ll be there with me in spirit, like I know you always are…” He lets out a long, shaky breath as he bats back a few tears. Somehow no matter how many years pass, talking to him like this never gets easier.

“I’ve got to get back to Keith now or he’ll wake up and drag me into bed himself….You’re getting one hell of a grandson-in-law” He jokes, remembering that his Grandfather used to tease him about Keith like that. He touches his picture and bows his head to it, saying goodnight before heading back inside.

The second he’s back under the covers, Keith rolls over and latches onto him like he’s a teddy bear. He makes no complaints, just carefully adjusts himself so he can comfortably hold his boyfriend.

He can’t actually fall back asleep, though. It’s not like the nights he spent staring at the ceiling feeling like he was stuck in a dark void. No, this is sort of like when you’re a little kid, so excited to see what you’ll get from Santa, you stay up all night trying to catch a peek at him.

He’s just so excited and happy that his nerves make it impossible for him to fall back asleep. He just holds Keith close through the night, runs his fingers through his hair, rubbing his back, soothing him when it seems like he might be waking. Every now and then he’ll feel Keith nuzzle his face into his shoulder and he’ll look down at his smooshed sleepy face and think to himself ‘Tomorrow he’ll be my Fiancé. Someday, he’ll be my husband.’ Nothing in the world has ever felt righter than that thought.

The time flies by somehow and once the sun has fully risen, letting light seep into their room, Shiro carefully begins to maneuver out of Keith’s grasp much to his sleepy boyfriends’ protest.

“Baby,let me up, I’m going to go start breakfast,” He coos, like he does every morning. Keith grumbles in displeasure, never happy to let Shiro leave the bed, but lets go anyway at the promise of coffee and food. Shiro brushes away a tuft of hair and kisses the top of his head, Keith rolling away to the other side of the bed with a happy humming sound.

Since his back is turned, Shiro moves the ring from his robe to the pocket of his pajama pants, leaving his robe hanging because he knows Keith will steal it if he’s cold when he gets up.

The ring has moved a lot in the last week. He actually had it hidden wedged behind the dresser, but a few days ago he took it out to look at it and Keith walked in so he dropped it into his sock drawer in a panic before Keith could see it and forgot to re-hide it. After realizing Keith was the one who usually puts away the clean laundry, he moved it to the top of the bookshelf were Keith can’t reach. Yesterday he put in the pocket of his robe just because he wanted it to be close to him.

He gets the coffee going in the kitchen and pulls out everything he needs for breakfast. He’s halfway through making the second omelet when a warm chest is pressed to his back, and arms wrap tightly around his waist.

“Hmph.” Keith makes a muffled sound as he bumps his head against Shiro’s shoulder.

“Morning, Baby, go get your coffee. Food is almost done.” Keith nods his head against Shiro’s back, staying there for another moment or two before he pulls himself off to waddle towards the coffee pot. Shiro chuckles as he looks over his shoulder at him.

Keith still insists on wearing Shiro’s shirts and a pair of briefs (that aren’t even visible) to bed. Despite seeing it every night and every morning for months, it still makes Shiro’s mouth water.

Keith has the sex drive of an energizer bunny, but Shiro never can deny him anything; he’s always willing to give Keith whatever he wants. Not that he isn’t just as bad, it’s a little hard to keep his hands to himself around his boyfriend.

“Don’t burn my food, Shiro!” Keith grumbles into his mug, Shiro huffing and turning his attention away from his boyfriend’s extremely long and ridiculously flexible legs to flip his omelet.

He finishes their food and they take it and their coffee to the living room. They curl up on the couch and Keith turns on _Home Alone_ while they take turns feeding one another bites of food until credits roll.

They open their own stockings and then give Kosmo all his new toys and let him sample his new treats as they settle down on the couch all together. Keith presses into Shiro’s side, letting out a long, happy sigh.

“I think we succeeded in making the best first Christmas.” He grins, pressing a lazy kiss to Shiro’s shoulder. Shiro returns it with a kiss to the head.

“Well, Christmas isn’t over yet.” His hand makes its way beneath the blanket, to his pocket for the ring box. He holds it for a second, unsure of what to do now and his throat grows tight, like he might cry.

“I’ve got a present for you, baby, and I really hope you like it.”

He decides to just go right for it, because he knows if he starts over thinking it, he’ll choke up and not go through with it. He’s got a little speech prepared that he’s rehearsed it over and over again in his head but before he can even start it, Keith cuts him off.

“I’ve got one for you too. Reach under the couch,” he tells him. Curious and unsure, Shiro hesitates, really wanting to go first, but he does as told and reaches under the couch, that usually hosts nothing but Kosmo’s fur. His hand brushes against something solid and rough, like paper, and he pulls it out.

It’s the sketchbook he got for Keith all those years ago.

“Open it.” Keith whispers.

With careful hands, Shiro opens it to the first page.

It’s him. Sketches adorn the book, younger and confident versions of himself. He’s smiling at the viewer, his hair straight black and short. There’s a smile on his lips, and a light in his eyes and he just knows he’s looking at Keith. Flipping the page, there’s more rough versions, seemingly rushed but still containing a high level of care. He’s bending down, kneeling to pet a stray alley cat. Shiro remembers the moment fondly, Keith and him coercing the cat into their arms so they could find his owner. He must’ve drawn this one from memory, but he nailed the cat’s features, the small tabby no older than a year.

The next few consist of Shiro and Matt at the diner Keith used to work at, laughing in front of two large margaritas while other customers fill in the background. Turning through some more, Shiro comes to the realization that almost every page is filled with images of him. Small notes are scribbled next to the dated images, typically transcribing the event.

Next to the diner image, _Matt and Shiro decided to keep me company at work – they’ve been laughing over Professor Slav’s mishap in class. Apparently, he couldn’t figure out how to close out the YouTube ad, declared it ‘the bad reality’ and had to cancel class._

There’s a couple of Shiro studying or curled up on the couch and there’s a few that aren’t of him. Some of his old apartments living room featuring a massive pillow and blanket fort. One of the Café where they had their first date. The park where they used to have picnics.

They’re all dated, indicating that Keith had drawn these before, when he first got the sketchbook.

Towards the end though, the dates change to more recent ones.

There’s one of Shiro, as he is now, at his desk and he looks strong and proud. There’s so much detail in it, it’s incredible. There’s one of Shiro standing, holding Keith’s morning coffee and a brown paper bag with a smiley face on it. A work meeting that has all their friends in it, where everyone seems to be messing around. Shiro on the black Lion.

He even captured the first time Shiro joined Keith and Krolia for dinner with the rest of the Blades of Marmora. A whole page of smaller sketched of him in various poses with Kosmo: petting him on the floor, walking him, curled up in bed with him, giving him treats. There is also an incredible sketch of their apartment with all their Christmas decorations.

When Shiro flips to the last page, all the air in his lungs vanishes, and tears start brimming in his eyes.

The last sketch is the two of them on the couch, exactly as they are, with Shiro presenting the ring box to Keith. There’s tears drawn on Keith’s cheeks, and when he looks up they’re there in real-life to match.   
“Hurry up and give me the fucking ring, Shiro.”

Keith tries to laugh but it gets caught in his throat a little bit. Shiro’s eyes are wide and his brain is struggling to catch up but he scrambles for the box.

“I had a speech prepared.” He mumbles, a little upset that he doesn’t get to say the words he’s worked so hard on for the last few days.

“Save it for the wedding vows, Shiro. I want that ring on my finger.” Shiro laughs but shakes his head as he pops open the box, he almost wants to agree with Keith, but he knows he has to say something.

“Patience, baby. This ring has a story.”

It’s a black band with gold cracks detailing it, perfectly polished and sized for Keith. He made a black obsidian ring, purposely made dents and cracks in it to incorporate the Kintsugi craft, filling in the damage with gold. It’s an Asian tradition that’s been used to make something broken, beautiful, rather than to try and hide it. It’s perfect for them, for their story, for their love.

“When I left for Japan, this is what I went to go get. My grandfather used to make jewelry, so I wanted him to teach me how to make a ring worthy of you… Sorry it took me so long to get it to you.”

He slides it onto Keith’s finger withy shaky hands, and the striking black and gold look at home on Keiths pale hand, that ring is finally where it belongs. Not a second later Keith flings himself into Shiro’s arms and kisses him fiercely. Keith pushes every ounce of his love for Shiro into that kiss, and Shiro feels like he will never have to worry about anything else ever again.

When they pull away, Shiro is met with wide violet eyes that put the stars to shame, and a smile that’ll warm his heart forever. 

“Better late than never.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, and the story as a whole! Let me know what you think!   
> Again, a huge thank you to my Beta for helping me out with this massive chapter. 
> 
> ALSO! I have a new fic out! It's a fake dating AU, it'll be about four chapters long. I'll be using it as a spacer while I work on my next longer fic, so check that out!

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Tumblr @AuthenticallyVintageQueer


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